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The nuclear family is well adapted to moving due to its size. Do you think children benefit in any way from moving? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v.1

The nuclear family is well adapted to moving due to its size. Do you think children benefit in any way from moving? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1
Immediate families are capable of relocating overseas because of how small they are. I believe their offspring can greatly benefit from this academically and culturally. As well as, I think the benefits of this overshadow the drawbacks. The depature of an entire household from their home town to another country has great positives for their children. Firstly, people usually move out because they have found better work opporutnities abroad. Therefore, their destination country is usually more developed educationally. For this reason, their children may have greater chances to enroll in better universities in order to obtain a good university degree. For example, my family moved to Qatar from Sudan when i was 14, since then, I enrolled in Georgetown University, a world known institution with branches in America and the Uk. This opporutnity has paved the way for a very successful career. Overall, this is just one of the many benefits moving brings. Despite the neglible disadvantage moving brings, such as, being away from home and family and friends, it is more advantageous in many ways. To begin with, youngsters get to experience new cultures, in turn, learn new languages. Which may help them in their future jobs, for instance, this is because billingual employees are preferred in the workforce. Futhermore, moving is not temporary, these children can eventually move back to their home towns, fully equipped with the tools, experience and education they obtained from living abroad. Undoubtedly, relocating abroad is seen as a positive development. In conclusion, the ease of which immediate families can move globally, has positively facilitated the new generation in numerous ways.
Immediate
families
are capable of relocating overseas
because
of how
small
they are. I believe their offspring can
greatly
benefit from this
academically
and
culturally
.
As well
as, I
think
the benefits of this overshadow the drawbacks.

The
depature
of an entire household from their home town to another country has great positives for their children.
Firstly
,
people
usually
move
out
because
they have found better work
opporutnities
abroad.
Therefore
, their destination country is
usually
more developed
educationally
.
For this reason
, their children may have greater chances to enroll in better universities in order to obtain a
good
university degree.
For example
, my
family
moved
to Qatar from Sudan when
i
was 14, since then, I enrolled in Georgetown University, a world known institution with branches in America and the
Uk
. This
opporutnity
has paved the way for a
very
successful career.
Overall
, this is
just
one of the
many
benefits moving brings.

Despite the
neglible
disadvantage moving brings, such as, being away from home and
family
and friends, it is more advantageous in
many
ways. To
begin
with, youngsters
get
to experience new cultures, in turn, learn new languages. Which may
help
them in their future jobs,
for instance
, this is
because
billingual
employees
are preferred
in the workforce.
Futhermore
, moving is not temporary, these children can
eventually
move
back to their home towns,
fully
equipped with the tools, experience and education they obtained from living abroad.
Undoubtedly
, relocating abroad is
seen
as a
positive
development.

In conclusion
, the
ease
of which immediate
families
can
move
globally, has
positively
facilitated the new generation in numerous ways.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
Knowledge of languages is the doorway to wisdom.
Roger Bacon

IELTS essay The nuclear family is well adapted to moving due to its size. Do you think children benefit in any way from moving? Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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