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The most important knowledge does not come from books.

The most important knowledge does not come from books. D9Yk
We are living in 21st Century where technologies have gone more advanced and greater than ever before. Which also means, the understanding where the most important knowledge came from books is not relevant anymore. Today we can gather and learn all of the important information and knowledge we wanted from technologies such as computer, laptop or even smartphones thanks to the Internet. The Internet provides us a giant world of many fascinating knowledge which you can explore without any limits, even the biggest the library have its own limits in knowledge compare to the Internet. The reasons why the Internet is better than books in every way is because of how big our world and our society. Books not only cannot contain all of the knowledge that the human race have learned but also they will take up all of our space which is very inconvenient. While the Internet can contain every of those knowledge it in a computer memory and take up a small space. The reasons I know this because of my experience in surfing web. After been surfing the web for so long, I have learned that the Internet is not only a other sources of knowledge but it also have all the knowledge that books in school doesn't have and compare both of those learning experiences together. Learning from the Internet is absolutely way more fun and fascinating than learning from a book, at least for a majority of people. So in conclusion, the most important knowledge does not only come from books but also come from the Internet and learning from the Internet is way better than learning from a book.
We are living in 21st Century where technologies have gone more advanced and greater than ever
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
. Which
also
means, the understanding where the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
came from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
is not relevant anymore.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
we can gather and learn
Consider using "all the".
all of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
information and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
we wanted from technologies such as computer, laptop or even smartphones thanks to the Internet. The Internet provides us a giant world of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
fascinating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
which you can explore without any limits, even the biggest the library have its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
limits in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
compare to the Internet. The reasons why the Internet is better than
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books
in every way is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
our world and our society.
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Books
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
cannot contain
Consider using "all the".
all of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
that the human race have learned
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
they will take up all of our space which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
inconvenient. While the Internet can contain every of those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
it in a computer memory and take up a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
space. The reasons I know this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of my experience in surfing web.
Did you mean "after being"?
After been
surfing the web for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
long, I have learned that the Internet is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
other sources of
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knowledge
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but
it
also
Did you mean "has"?
have
all the
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knowledge
that
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books
in school doesn't have and compare both of those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
experiences together.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Learning
from the Internet is
absolutely
way more fun and fascinating than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
, at least for a majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
in conclusion
, the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
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knowledge
does not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from the Internet and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
from the Internet is way better than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
.
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IELTS essay The most important knowledge does not come from books.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
276 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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