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The modern world demands less physical activity than in the twentieth century, nevertheless the progress is the reason of the health problem around the world, so to maintain the normal lifestyle there is two common ways of being fit by doing physically demanding exercises, using diets, preventative medicine and by leading simple life. I strongly agree with the second type of saving well-being because of the life example met in the real life.

The modern world demands less physical activity than in the twentieth century, nevertheless the progress is the reason of the health problem around the world, so to maintain the normal lifestyle there is two common ways of being fit by doing physically demanding exercises, using diets, preventative medicine and by leading simple life. I strongly agree with the second type of saving well-being because of the life example met in the real life. ElWML
The modern world demands less physical activity than in the twentieth century, nevertheless the progress is the reason of the health problem around the world, so to maintain the normal lifestyle there is two common ways of being fit by doing physically demanding exercises, using diets, preventative medicine and by leading simple life. I strongly agree with the second type of saving well-being because of the life example met in the real life. First of all, one should differ training aims, which are to recover from illness, surgical operations or traumas, supporting health, gaining power or beauty of the body. Last mentioned two types require from culturist to spend at least three hours of doing physically demanding exercises, to eat over excess and to use drugs and stimulators, what as well can be related to professional athletes, fighters. As the results the body starts to destroy under those impacts and internal organs suffers from the consuming unnatural products. On the other hand, working out without complementary weights and using aerobic training programs and optimized amount of nutrients can help to heal from muscle traumas and even extend the lifetime. It is proved that following those recommendation increase stamina, keeps the blood pressure and heartbeat rate in the desired diapason, increases mental activity. In shorter words, it is better to maintain normal life than to overdo. In conclusion, despite of the advantages and disadvantages only the human decides which way to choose. Nevertheless, analyzing downgrades of the professional sportsmen`s life it is more comfortable to not break the limits of the organism.
The modern world demands less physical activity than in the twentieth century,
nevertheless
the progress is the reason of the health problem around the world,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
to maintain the normal lifestyle there is two common ways of
being fit
by doing
physically
demanding exercises, using diets, preventative medicine and by leading simple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the second type of saving well-being
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
example met in the real life.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, one should differ training aims, which are to recover from illness, surgical operations or traumas, supporting health, gaining power or beauty of the body. Last mentioned two types require from
Possible spelling mistake found.
culturist
to spend at least three hours of doing
physically
demanding exercises, to eat over excess and to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
drugs and stimulators, what
as well
can
be related
to professional athletes, fighters. As the results the body
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
under those impacts and internal organs suffers from the consuming unnatural products.

On the other hand
, working out without complementary weights and using aerobic training programs and optimized amount of nutrients can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to heal from muscle traumas and even extend the lifetime. It
is proved
that following those recommendation increase stamina,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
the blood pressure and heartbeat rate in the desired diapason, increases mental activity. In shorter words, it is better to maintain normal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
than to overdo.

In conclusion
,
Did you mean "despite" (or, alternatively, 'in spite of')?
despite of
the advantages and disadvantages
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the human decides which way to choose.
Nevertheless
, analyzing downgrades of the professional
The character between 'sportsmen' and 's' is an accent character, not a standard apostrophe character. Use "sportsmen’s" (curly apostrophe) or "sportsmen's" (straight apostrophe).
sportsmen`s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
it is more comfortable to not break the limits of the organism.
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IELTS essay The modern world demands less physical activity than in the twentieth century, nevertheless the progress is the reason of the health problem around the world, so to maintain the normal lifestyle there is two common ways of being fit by doing physically demanding exercises, using diets, preventative medicine and by leading simple life. I strongly agree with the second type of saving well-being because of the life example met in the real life.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
261 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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