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The major cities in the world are growing fast,as well as their problem.what are the problems that young people living in cities are facing with?give solutions to these problem.

The major cities in the world are growing fast, as well as their problem. what are the problems that young people living in cities are facing with? give solutions to these problem. NAKN
In recent times, it has been observed that metropolis cities all around the world are rapidly expanding, while several problems occur due to this progression. However, a few precautionary steps can be implemented to remedy the situation. Both aspects are explicated in the ensuing paragraphs. Discussing the problem for the occurrence, the foremost one is the maintaining standard of living. All of the cost of accommodation and food is increasing rate in urban areas. This is to say that competition in business among the cities. The young people concentrated more on their job and thus, hectic schedule life to make handsome salaries for living in big cities. Moreover, the another major problem is the traffic. New infrastructure system development around the cities and most densely occupied area, many of them prefer their own vehicles to use over public transportation. Therfores, young people's of lifes become more struggling. a recent study shows that 60% of people living in metropolitan suffering from anxiety and depression to living in metropolitan cities. In conclusion, although due to the growth of progression in big cities young people have difficulty living and traffic congestion and suffering from diseases, the government provide proper town planning for the cities and eradicate health issue.
In recent times, it has
been observed
that metropolis
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
all around the world are
rapidly
expanding, while several problems occur due to this progression.
However
, a few precautionary steps can
be implemented
to remedy the situation. Both aspects
are explicated
in the ensuing paragraphs.

Discussing the problem for the occurrence, the foremost one is the maintaining standard of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
.
Consider using "all the".
All of the
cost of accommodation and food is increasing rate in urban areas. This is to say that competition in business among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
. The young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
concentrated more on their job and
thus
, hectic schedule life to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
handsome salaries for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
.
Moreover
, the another major problem is the traffic. New infrastructure system development around the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
and most
densely
occupied area,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of them prefer their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
vehicles to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
over public transportation.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Therfores
, young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's of
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "lives", the plural form of the noun 'life'?
lifes
become more struggling.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
a
recent study
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that 60% of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in metropolitan suffering from anxiety and depression to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in metropolitan cities.

In conclusion
, although due to the growth of progression in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have difficulty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
and traffic congestion and suffering from diseases, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
provide proper town planning for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
and eradicate health issue.

IELTS essay The major cities in the world are growing fast, as well as their problem. what are the problems that young people living in cities are facing with? give solutions to these problem.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
205 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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