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The information revolution by modern mass media has both positive and negative consequences for individuals and for society To what extent do you agree

The information revolution by modern mass media has both positive and negative consequences for individuals and for society To what extent do you agree XGojA
Nowadays, the information revolution led by modern mass media has become a prevalent topic for debate. Some people point out that they have positive consequences for both individuals and society, while others indicate that they are harmful. Personally speaking, I agree that the information revolution leading by urban mass media has both positive and negative effects on individuals and society. On the one hand, the information revolution led by mass media can help individuals and society prevent the crisis. To illustrate, since there are numerous coverage and predictions about the natural disaster on TV and the internet, they will inform individuals and society to protect themselves and public property timely. For example, when I was living in Japan, a country with a high frequency of earthquakes, I found that every TV station was broadcasting earthquake predictions hourly. As a result, my friends and I can protect ourselves promptly at that time. On the other hand, the information revolution brought by mass media could mislead the individuals and the society on prescription medications. In other words, since the drug industries spent numerous amounts of money on advertisements with a misleading tone and inaccurate information, consumers are more likely persuaded to purchase prescription medicines that they don’t need. For instance, a drug company promoted a kind of diet pills and claimed any consumer who took them would lose weight by 40 kg in a week. However, both my friend and I still kept the same weight and didn’t get rid of obesity after purchasing and using this drug. To sum up, the information revolution generated by modern mass media has not only a positive impact on individuals and society such as the benefit of preventing the crisis but also negative influence such as the misleading on prescription medications.
Nowadays, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
revolution
led by modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
has become a prevalent topic for debate.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
point out that they have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
consequences for both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
, while others indicate that they are harmful.
Personally
speaking, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
revolution
leading by urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
has both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
and society.

On the one hand, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
revolution
led by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
the crisis. To illustrate, since there are numerous coverage and predictions about the natural disaster on TV and the internet, they will inform
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
to protect themselves and public property timely.
For example
, when I was living in Japan, a country with a high frequency of earthquakes, I found that every TV station was broadcasting earthquake predictions hourly.
As a result
, my friends and I can protect ourselves
promptly
at that time.

On the other hand
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
revolution
brought by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
could mislead the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
on prescription medications.
In other words
, since the drug industries spent numerous amounts of money on advertisements with a misleading tone and inaccurate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
, consumers are more likely persuaded to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
prescription medicines that they don’t need.
For instance
, a drug
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
promoted a kind of diet pills and claimed any consumer who took them would lose weight by 40 kg in a week.
However
, both my friend and I
still
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
the same weight and didn’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid of obesity after purchasing and using this drug.

To sum up, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
revolution
generated by modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
has not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
such as the benefit of preventing the crisis
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
influence such as the misleading on prescription medications.
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IELTS essay The information revolution by modern mass media has both positive and negative consequences for individuals and for society To what extent do you agree

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
296 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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