Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The diagrams below show UK students' responses to the question of to what extent would they describe themselves as financially organised. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. v.1

The diagrams below show UK students' responses to the question of
To be truth-teller or liar was a challenge for people in the whole world in history. All cultures and religions offer people to tell the truth, but sometimes they tend to tell lies for some reasons which most of them are lame excused. People tell the falsehood in order to control a situation. They opine that they give up control by telling the truth. Moreover, they don't want to disappoint those who are around them. They may be afraid of loosing the respect. They are worried about you might reject or shame them. Also lies are assumed to be like a snowball. It is about how lie grows. You just tell a little bitty lie, then to cover that, you have to tell another one and another and another, each gets bigger and bigger. The more telling lie, easier to tell it, thus the liars tell lies more and more. In most situations telling the lie is not acceptable due to harming other people, for instance, when you tell a lie about the price of goods which are cheaper than you want to sell, but sometimes you can give a chance other people enjoy their life by telling the lie, for example consider a doctor who tells a lie about health conditions of a patient whom there is not hope to survive him or her. In spite of telling lies which are unacceptable in religion and culture, the behaviour of a doctor is admirable. In conclusion, no one accepts to hear lies, but sometime listening to white falsehood is better than bitter truth. People should deny telling lies for their personal benefits. These lies, not only harm other people, but also may lead the others don't trust you. Therefore, it is important to be careful about what we say.
To be truth-teller or liar was a challenge for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the whole world in history. All cultures and religions offer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tell
the truth,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
they tend to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lies
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons which most of them are lame excused.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tell
the falsehood in order to control a situation. They opine that they give up control by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
telling
the truth.
Moreover
, they don't want to disappoint those who are around them. They may be afraid of
Did you mean "losing the"?
loosing the
respect. They
are worried
about you might reject or shame them.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lies
are assumed
to be like a snowball. It is about how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lie
grows. You
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tell
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
bitty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lie
, then to cover that, you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tell
another one and another and another, each
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
bigger and bigger. The more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
telling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lie
, easier to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tell
it,
thus
the liars
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lies
more and more.

In most situations
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
telling
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lie
is not acceptable due to harming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
for instance
, when you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tell
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lie
about the price of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
which are cheaper than you want to sell,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
you can give a chance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
enjoy their life by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
telling
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lie
,
for example
consider a doctor who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tells
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lie
about health conditions of a patient whom there is not hope to survive him or her.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
In spite of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
telling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lies
which are unacceptable in religion and culture, the
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
of a doctor is admirable.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
conclusion, no one accepts to hear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lies
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
sometime listening to white falsehood is better than bitter truth.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
should deny
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
telling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lies
for their personal benefits. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lies
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
harm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
may lead the others don't trust you.
Therefore
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to be careful about what we say.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay The diagrams below show UK students' responses to the question of

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
299 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts