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The advantages and disadvantages of small villages

The advantages and disadvantages of small villages 8QLnB
Everyone who lived in small villages in the past, Recently the main centra transfer from small villages to big cities, and then high building is more and more than before. There are advantages and disadvantages about small villages. There are three main positive sides, First of all, Children can have fun with relatives and talk about skill that you learn at school or what problem did you suffer and how to solve it. Not only focus on the smart phone, It’s benefit for each other. Secondly, It’s more comfortable and bigger than big cities, However, You can relax and enjoy everyday also focus on one thing and do it well. Eventually, the best merit is security in small villages, Although some of small villages have set up security guard by volunteer, but I think it was already safer than big cities, Overall the above three advantages, I think It’s suitable for elderly people of retirement life. I think there were three negative sides about small villages, Firstly, It’s essential for everyone is transportation, Most of people have their own transportation, It’s more inconvenient than big cities, Nevertheless, you have your own transportation, public transportation can save more money for teenager. Secondly is about job, Technology is grow faster than before, lot of job opportunity transfer to big cities. Finally, It’s necessary in our whole life. Hospital must be important, If you having emergency about body, especially distance, How far are hospital near by your small villages. Overall above, these are the problems that small villages will face it. In my opinion, the advantages of small villages is suitable for elderly people or retirement life, who can enjoy their retirement life and don’t worry about security, It’s safer than big cities, and Sometimes have pleasure with relatives, In contrast, The disadvantages of small villages is negative for teenagers, The public transportation is inconvenient and most of job opportunity less than big cities, However, the biggest problem is medical equipment, but technology will lead all the sectors growth up, also medical equipment will become better than before, This will not be a problem for small villages in the future.
Everyone who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
in
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small
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villages
in the past, Recently the main
Possible spelling mistake found.
centra
transfer from
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small
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villages
to
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big
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cities
, and then high building is more and more than
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before
.

There are advantages and disadvantages about
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small
villages.

There are three main
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positive
sides,
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First of all
, Children can have fun with relatives and talk about
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skill
that you learn at school or what
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problem
did you suffer and how to solve it. Not
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only
focus on the smart phone, It’s benefit for each other.
Secondly
, It’s more comfortable and bigger than
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big
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cities
,
However
, You can relax and enjoy
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
also
focus on one thing and do it well.
Eventually
, the best merit is security in
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small
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villages
, Although
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some
of
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small
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villages
have set up security guard by volunteer,
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but
I
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think
it was already safer than
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big
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cities
,
Overall
the above three advantages, I
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think
It’s suitable for elderly
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people
of retirement life.

I
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think
there were three
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negative
sides about
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small
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villages
,
Firstly
, It’s essential for everyone is
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transportation
, Most of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have their
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own
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transportation
, It’s more inconvenient than
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big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
,
Nevertheless
, you have your
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own
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transportation
, public
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transportation
can save more money for
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teenager
.
Secondly
is about job, Technology is
Consider using a past participle here: "grown".
grow
faster than
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before
,
It seems that an article is missing.
lot of
job opportunity transfer to
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big
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cities
.
Finally
, It’s necessary in our whole life. Hospital
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must
be
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important
, If
Did you mean "you're having", "you are having", or "you were having"?
you having
emergency about body,
especially
distance, How far are hospital
Did you mean "nearby"?
near by
your
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small
villages.

Overall
above, these are the
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problems
that
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small
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villages
will face it.

In my opinion, the advantages of
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small
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villages
is suitable for elderly
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people
or retirement life, who can enjoy their retirement life and don’t worry about security, It’s safer than
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big
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cities
, and
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Sometimes
have pleasure with relatives,
In contrast
, The disadvantages of
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small
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villages
is
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negative
for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
, The public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
is inconvenient and
Consider using "most job" or "most of the job".
most of job
opportunity less than
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big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
,
However
, the biggest
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problem
is medical equipment,
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but
technology will lead all the
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "sectors'" or "sector's"?
sectors
growth up,
also
medical equipment will become better than
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before
, This will not be a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
in the future.
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IELTS essay The advantages and disadvantages of small villages

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
357 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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