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TELLING A BOOK THAT CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS

TELLING A BOOK THAT CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS lXdq9
Previously, I haven’t read any books carefully, when I took any books and read some front page the feeling of sleepiness come up. In this time, the disease make everyone staying at home and I decided to read as least as 3 books in this period. Finally, I found a great book with the tile “50 things didn’t teach in school” which bring a new look about the life. I was very surprised and expansion of sight about society. Some students believed that if they had a good diploma after they graduated at high school or famous university, they wouldn’t worry about the employment issues. As a matter of fact, the knowledge of students in university is not enough to workout in company and the employers need more soft skill in any jobs. Apparently, in university or high school, some teachers or lectures virtually teach about abstract theories, and students often try to cram knowledge even they didn’t understand and wondered why they must to learn by heart this knowledge which not applicable in daily life. However, this book showed me how to make a plan for my future career as soon as possible, and beside learning as many soft skills as possible in order not to be confused when it’s time to make one’s way in the world( to be equipped to make one’s way in the world). The way to find both your strengths and weaknesses, the next step, you must promote strengths or restrict and improve weaknesses. Otherwise, in every jobs, success and failure always together, learning of accepts is the best lesson that you must to learn. In conclusion, from the book I found that success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm.
Previously, I haven’t read any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
carefully
, when I took any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and read
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
front page the feeling of sleepiness
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up. In this time, the disease
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
everyone
The pronoun 'everyone' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "stays", "staid", "stayed".
staying
at home and I decided to read as
Did you mean "less", "little"?
least
as 3
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
in this period.
Finally
, I found a great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
with the tile “50 things didn’t teach in school” which bring a new look about the life. I was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
surprised and expansion of sight about society.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
students believed that if they had a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
diploma after they
The verb 'to graduate' requires the preposition 'from': "graduated from".
graduated
at high school or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
university, they wouldn’t worry about the employment issues. As a matter of fact, the knowledge of students in university is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to workout in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
and the employers need more soft
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
in any jobs.
Apparently
, in university or high school,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
teachers or lectures
virtually
teach about abstract theories, and students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
try to cram knowledge even they didn’t understand and wondered why they
After 'must', the verb is used without 'to'. Probably, you should use "must" or "have to" here.
must to
learn by heart this knowledge which not applicable in daily life.
However
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
me how to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
a plan for my future career as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as possible, and beside learning as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
soft
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
as possible in order not to
be confused
when it’s time to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
one’s way in the world
Don't put a space after the opening parenthesis
(
to
be equipped
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
one’s way in the world). The way to find both your strengths and weaknesses, the
next
step, you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
promote strengths or restrict and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
weaknesses.
Otherwise
, in every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "job"?
jobs
, success and failure always together, learning of accepts is the best lesson that you
After 'must', the verb is used without 'to'. Probably, you should use "must" or "have to" here.
must to
learn.
In conclusion
, from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
I found that success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm.
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IELTS essay TELLING A BOOK THAT CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
295 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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