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Television is a technological device which delivers entertainment and information.

Television is a technological device which delivers entertainment and information. 86Kmx
Television is a technological device which delivers entertainment and information. Watching TV has become a common recreational activity for quite a long time, especially for kids around the globe. However, there are a lot of arguments surrounded its benefits and drawbacks. This essay will discuss both sides of watching TV in details. To begin with, television has a myriad of advantages which plays an essential role in child’s personal growth. Firstly, television acts as an efficient source of learning. TV provides a wide variety of educational programs from Maths, Science, History to Language which enables them to broaden their knowledge about a particular subject and assists them in deciding their future career. Furthermore, children can learn moral lessons in a fun way by watching cognitive channels which are specially dedicated to them. For example, programs about animal planet or environment can raise children’ awareness about preserving forest or wild species in general. Lastly, TV series or children’s programs are sources of entertainment which can help children to alleviate pressure effectively after a tiring day at school. Admittedly, TV also has some negative impacts on children. Needless to say, it can cause some physical problems such as eye-strain and obesity. Besides, over-watching may result in addition, wastage of time and lack of concentration. Moreover, prolonged exposure may affect their studies. It is very common for children to spend many hours without supervision and forget that they have to do homework, or do not rest properly because they go to bed late watching programs. To conclude, every coin has two sides, and watching TV is no exception. Howerver, I believe that the benefits of TVs outweigh the demerits that it causes. Using TV in moderation and under parents’ guidance is beneficial for children’s entertainment and studying. Provided TVs are used in a responsible manner, there is no limit to the value that this device adds to the world.
Television is a technological device which delivers entertainment and information. Watching TV has become a common recreational activity for quite a long time,
especially
for kids around the globe.
However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
arguments surrounded its benefits and drawbacks. This essay will discuss both sides of watching TV in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, television has a myriad of advantages which plays an essential role in child’s personal growth.
Firstly
, television acts as an efficient source of learning. TV provides a wide variety of educational programs from
Possible spelling mistake. 'Maths' is British English.
Maths
, Science, History to Language which enables them to broaden their knowledge about a particular subject and assists them in deciding their future career.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can learn moral lessons
Consider replacing "in a fun way" with the adverb for "fun"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in a fun way
by watching cognitive channels which are
specially
dedicated to them.
For example
, programs about animal planet or environment can raise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’
awareness about preserving forest or wild species
in general
.
Lastly
, TV series or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
programs are sources of entertainment which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to alleviate pressure
effectively
after a tiring day at school.

Admittedly
, TV
also
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. Needless to say, it can cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
physical problems such as eye-strain and obesity.
Besides
, over-watching may result
in addition
, wastage of time and lack of concentration.
Moreover
, prolonged exposure may affect their studies. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
common for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
hours without supervision and forget that they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do homework, or do not rest
properly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they go to bed late watching programs.

To conclude
, every coin has two sides, and watching TV is no exception.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Howerver
, I believe that the benefits of TVs outweigh the demerits that it causes. Using TV in moderation and under parents’ guidance is beneficial for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
entertainment and studying. Provided TVs are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
Consider replacing "in a responsible manner" with the adverb for "responsible"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in a responsible manner
, there is no limit to the value that this device
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
adds
to the world.
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IELTS essay Television is a technological device which delivers entertainment and information.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
316 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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