Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

technology has evolved and changed people communicate with each other

technology has evolved and changed people communicate with each other k5pj2
It is true that currently technology has evolved and changed the way people communicate with each other. Although there are many positive aspects due to evolution of technology, there are few negative developments regarding relationships and bonding between people. Some ways in which technology affected the relationships between citizens are discussed in the paragraph below. To begin with, due to advancement in technology people can easily communicate across the world. Due to easy access of various messenger apps and video calls most of the people are developing their relationships through mobile phones and social media. Besides personal communications, official and business communications have become easier by using emails and conducting meetings online. Virtual celebrations are taking a front row nowadays. When people tend to miss any important occasion in the family or couldn’t make it due to their busy schedule they can have a virtual meet with their family. By this way they can maintain a feeling of togetherness and build a lot of memories together even from afar. Few negative impacts that are affecting relationships due to technology are firstly, most of the people especially youngsters are getting addicted to the technology due to which there is significantly less time spent together with the family. Also, less satisfaction and connection. Secondly, excessive use of mobile phones and social media can cause a lot of mental health issues like depression and anxiety. This would have bad repercussions on relationships which leads to decreased opportunity for bonding and result in unmet needs. Thirdly, older people are not accustomed to this modern technology which have great effects on communication and bonding with their kids who are afar. Finally I conclude by saying that connecting with people can be advantages in this digital era but the way we are becoming dependent on this technology can have negative results on personal and social aspects.
It is true that
currently
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has evolved and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
communicate with each other. Although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
aspects
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to evolution of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, there are few
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
developments regarding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
and bonding between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
ways in which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
between citizens
are discussed
in the paragraph below.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to advancement in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
easily
communicate across the world.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Due
to easy access of various messenger apps and video calls most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are developing their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
through mobile phones and social media.
Besides
personal communications, official and business communications have become easier by using emails and conducting meetings online. Virtual celebrations are taking a front row nowadays. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to miss any
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
occasion in the family or couldn’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to their busy schedule they can have a virtual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
with their family. By this way they can maintain a feeling of togetherness and build
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
memories together even from afar.

Few
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts that are affecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
are
firstly
, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
especially
youngsters are getting addicted to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to which there is
significantly
less time spent together with the family.
Also
, less satisfaction and connection.
Secondly
, excessive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of mobile phones and social media can cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
mental health issues like depression and anxiety. This would have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
repercussions on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
which leads to decreased opportunity for bonding and result in unmet needs.
Thirdly
, older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not accustomed to this modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
which have great effects on communication and bonding with their kids who are afar.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Finally
I conclude by saying that connecting with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can be advantages in this digital era
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the way we are becoming dependent on this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
can have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
results on personal and social aspects.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay technology has evolved and changed people communicate with each other

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
310 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts