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Suppose you have a small grocery store. The population living around your shop is more than 5,000 people. In your opinion, how can those 5,000 people, everyone want to come to your store to buy things?

Suppose you have a small grocery store. The population living around your shop is more than 5, 000 people. In your opinion, how can those 5, 000 people, everyone want to come to your store to buy things? PMopE
- Nowadays, there are lots of stores are open but there are many store have to close because they are not noticed by customers. Suppose i have a small grocery store and the population living around my shop is more than 5, 000 people. In my opinion, first i will choose the location that my customers easy to noticed, a location where lots of people often pass by my store. Second, choose the items the sell are very important, i think i will choose the items that the population living around my shop needs, i would like to choose sell simple things, it have a good quality like food, soft dinks, snacks and household items from famous brand that everyone were knowing and choosing. Those items are necessary items and most people usually need to use them almost every day, so I think they will be easily interest to customers. Next is the decoration of the store, if your store is not clean and well at organized, no customers will want to buy. Let's create a friendly and fun atmosphere so that customers feel well and next time they will come to buy again. With the developmet of technology, i can promote my shop on the social media as: Facebook, Shopee, . . . to approach people living around me and other people from different areas. And so my income and sales will also increase. Especially, sales need to have their heart put into it, listen to your customers what they need to improve your shop or else no customers will come to buy anymore.
Consider using an m-dash in dialogues and enumerations.
-
Nowadays, there are lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stores
are open
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
close
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are not noticed by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
. Suppose
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
grocery
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
and the population living around my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
is more than 5, 000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. In my opinion,
first
Did you mean "I"?
i
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
the location that my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
easy to noticed, a location where lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
pass by my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
. Second,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
the sell are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
Did you mean "I"?
i
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
that the population living around my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
,
Did you mean "I"?
i
would like to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
sell simple things, it
Did you mean "has"?
have
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
quality like food, soft
Possible spelling mistake found.
dinks
, snacks and household
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
brand that everyone
The verb 'knowing' is a stative verb and sometimes the progressive form is not correct. Try a simple form instead.
were knowing
and choosing. Those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
are necessary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
and most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
usually
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
them almost every day,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
they will be
easily
interest to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
.
Next
is the decoration of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
, if your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
is not clean and well at organized, no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
will want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
's create a friendly and fun atmosphere
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
feel well and
next
time they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
again. With the
Possible spelling mistake found.
developmet
of technology,
Did you mean "I"?
i
can promote my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
on the social media as: Facebook,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Shopee
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
to
approach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living around me and other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
areas. And
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
my income and sales will
also
increase.
Especially
, sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to have their heart put into it, listen to your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
what they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
or else no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
anymore.
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IELTS essay Suppose you have a small grocery store. The population living around your shop is more than 5, 000 people. In your opinion, how can those 5, 000 people, everyone want to come to your store to buy things?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
265 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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