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SUMMARISES THE INFORMATION BY SELECTING AND REPORTING THE MAIN FEATURES AND MAKE COMPARISON WHERE RELEVANT v.1

SUMMARISES THE INFORMATION BY SELECTING AND REPORTING THE MAIN FEATURES AND MAKE COMPARISON WHERE RELEVANT v. 1
Twenty first century has seen a tremendous rising trend of mobile phone usage. Since some cellular device users have been found to be antisocial, the idea of banning its use in certain places has also been raised. The banning of smoking is being referenced in this regard. This essay will discuss about disagreeing the idea through discussing the fallacies in brief. Mobile phones have successfully been updated in recent past to become a part and parcel of our daily life. Ensuring the prime purpose of communication, it is also being used for news update, entertainment and knowledge development. The public can get in touch with their friends and families much more easily than before, which in fact aids the community to become more social. Although arguments can be made about mobile devices taking over the newspaper usage, citizens are now getting more updated than before through regular updates from news applications. Web pages, applications & video sharing platforms have become popular hubs for knowledge seekers who can easily access the huge contents available on the web. For example, through YouTube videos students are learning topics in a more convenient way. On the contrary, smoking is regarded harmful towards health by almost all. Not only active smokers but also who are around them, carry almost the same risk of having lung diseases and even cancer. According to many scientific reports, lung cancer is now a leading cause of death all around the world. So, banning cell phone use in places is not the same as banning something that is alarming to health. To conclude, no restriction should be there for mobile phone use. Steps should rather be taken to provide with contents that will enhance learning, social harmony and revival.
Twenty
first
century has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
a tremendous rising trend of mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
usage. Since
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cellular device users have
been found
to be antisocial, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banning
its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
in certain places has
also
been raised
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banning
of smoking is
being referenced
in this regard. This essay will
Did you mean simply "discuss disagreeing"? You do not need the word "about" here.
discuss about disagreeing
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
through discussing the fallacies
in brief
.

Mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
have
successfully
been updated
in recent past to become a part and parcel of our daily life. Ensuring the prime purpose of communication, it is
also
being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for news update, entertainment and knowledge development. The public can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
in touch with their friends and families much more
easily
than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
, which in fact aids the community to become more social. Although arguments can
be made
about mobile devices taking over the newspaper usage, citizens are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
getting more updated than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
through regular updates from news applications. Web pages, applications & video sharing platforms have become popular hubs for knowledge seekers who can
easily
access the huge contents available on the web.
For example
, through YouTube videos students are learning topics in a more convenient way.

On the contrary
, smoking
is regarded
harmful towards health by almost all. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
active smokers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
who are around them, carry almost the same
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of having lung diseases and even cancer. According to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
scientific reports, lung cancer is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
a leading cause of death all around the world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banning
cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
in places is not the same as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banning
something
that is
alarming to health.

To conclude
, no restriction should be there for mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
. Steps should
rather
be taken
to provide with contents that will enhance learning, social harmony and revival.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay SUMMARISES THE INFORMATION BY SELECTING AND REPORTING THE MAIN FEATURES AND MAKE COMPARISON WHERE RELEVANT v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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