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Successful sportsmen can earn a great deal more than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Successful sportsmen can earn a great deal more than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. l6PX
Nowadays we can be witnessed that some sportsmen who are accomplished in their work can gain lots of money in comparison with other people. The discussion whether this is fair or not raises a thorny question. While some people consider that it is unfair for others, I am against of this perception. According to people who think it is unjustified that individual who earn a great deal of money due to sport. In their opinion, while other people labour for hours on weekdays and even at weekends and earn less amount of money during a month, sportsmen are able to get this quantity in a day. For instance, successful football players gain really high amount of money for each transfer to the team consequently, theachers work a lot for getting this quantity for all their life. As a consequense, money which has been earned by football players is ten times or more higher than money has been got by other people However others including me consider it is okey if sportsmen can earn enormous number money due to the fact, they do not get too much money since they were born. They work a lot, have exercised and struggled being in that position since they were children and as a result, after all efforts, they success their dreams. We could indicate C. Ronaldo as a sample, consequently, his living conditions were not comfortable and indeed, was poor on the contrary, he is one of the most accomplished footballer and the richest people in the world due to his efforts right know. To conclude, it is pretty justified for sportsman to earn lots of money owing to the fact, they have worked too much such as others to acquire their occupation.
Nowadays we can
be witnessed
that
some
sportsmen who
are accomplished
in their work can gain
lots
of
money
in comparison
with
other
people
. The discussion whether this is
fair
or not raises a thorny question. While
some
people
consider that it is unfair for others, I am against of this perception.

According to
people
who
think
it
is unjustified
that individual who
earn
a great deal of
money
due to sport. In their opinion, while
other
people
labour
for hours on weekdays and even at weekends and
earn
less amount of
money
during a month, sportsmen are able to
get
this quantity in a day.
For instance
, successful football players gain
really
high amount of
money
for each transfer to the team
consequently
,
theachers
work a
lot
for getting this quantity for all their life. As a
consequense
,
money
which has
been earned
by football players is ten times or
more higher
than
money
has been
got
by
other
people


However
others including me consider it is
okey
if sportsmen can
earn
enormous number
money
due to the fact, they do not
get
too much
money
since they
were born
. They work a
lot
, have exercised and struggled
being
in that position since they were children and
as a result
,
after all
efforts,
they success
their dreams. We could indicate C. Ronaldo as a sample,
consequently
, his living conditions were not comfortable and
indeed
, was poor
on the contrary
, he is one of the most accomplished footballer and the richest
people
in the world due to his efforts
right know
.

To conclude
, it is pretty justified for sportsman to
earn
lots
of
money
owing to the fact, they have worked too much such as others to acquire their occupation.
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IELTS essay Successful sportsmen can earn a great deal more than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
290 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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