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Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair

Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair wgVl
Some experts assert that the government should invest more money in sport and athletes can receive more wage than others. While numerous others suggest paying more money to sportsmen or women is unfair, all professionals should be paid an equal salary. Both groups have their reasons, which will discuss in the following paragraphs. On the one hand, some people believe athletes are country representative in the global sports competition. This group outlines the winning in a competition like the Olympics is one of the government's power sign. As a result, they suggest paying a great deal of money to sportsmen/women is essential because, having no problem with living expense cause more concentration on the exercises, which increases the chance of success. So, sports professionals compensate for their high salary by winning competitions and gaining medals which are an honour for their country and compatriots. On the other hand, a large group of people think that all professions should receive money considering their productivity. They claim that giving a high amount of money to athletes only because their job is unfair makes other people angry or disappointed. For example, there are excessive jobs such as doctors, teachers, firefighters, etc. , who serves others every day or put their lives in danger and rescue other people. Consequently, giving the high fee to athletes only because they compete in front of the other country is not fair since several professions are crucial. To sum up, there are two viewpoints about the amount of money paid to athletes. Some claim it should be high because they are country representative. In comparison, others think a significant amount of salary only for athletes is unfair compared to influential professions service others. I personally share the latter viewpoint and believe other jobs, such as firefighters or doctors, should earn more money.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
experts assert that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should invest more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in sport and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
can receive more wage than others. While numerous others suggest paying more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to sportsmen or women is unfair, all professionals should
be paid
an equal salary. Both groups have their reasons, which will discuss in the following paragraphs.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
representative in the global sports competition. This group outlines the winning in a competition like the Olympics is one of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
's power
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
.
As a result
, they suggest paying a great deal of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to sportsmen/women is essential
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, having no problem with living expense cause more concentration on the exercises, which increases the chance of success.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, sports professionals compensate for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
salary by winning competitions and gaining medals which are an
Possible spelling mistake. 'honour' is British English.
honour
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and compatriots.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, a large group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that all professions should receive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
considering their productivity. They claim that giving a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
their job is unfair
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
angry or disappointed.
For example
, there are excessive jobs such as doctors, teachers, firefighters, etc.
Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
,
who serves others every day or put their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
and rescue
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Consequently
, giving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
fee to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they compete in front of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
since several professions are crucial.

To sum up, there are two viewpoints about the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
paid to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
claim it should be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
representative.
In comparison
, others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
a significant amount of salary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
athletes
is unfair compared to influential professions service others. I
personally
share the latter viewpoint and believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
jobs, such as firefighters or doctors, should earn more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
.

IELTS essay Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
304 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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