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Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. k16M
There is always an argument between people, about a person’s personality after being released from prison. Some people who believe in humanity, think that it is a good idea to use these people to confront teenagers with the reality of life. In my concern, it is somehow even necessary. However, necessary precautions need to be taken. It is obvious that when someone becomes a criminal and goes to jail, will never be who he or she was before. However, this change can be in a good way. To illustrate, if there be an opportunity for a person in prison to find his or her way, and if the government try to rehabilitate prisoners by doing somethings like providing education and a good library in prison, there will be a might for prisoners to start a wonderful life and become a well experienced individual after prison time. Definitely, this person can teach this precious experience, which he paid a lot for, to the community and especially to teenagers. Consequently, in future teenagers will not try to do that kind of behavior and this will uproot a problem. In addition, most teenagers seem to not know all the negative consequences of being in jail. For instance, after being free from jail, law-violators may suffer from prejudice or discrimination from ordinary people in the community. So obviously, only ex-prisoners can tell others how it feels. On the other hand, it is even good for ex-prisoners. Telling their story to others will give them a good feeling and help them to be more accepted in the community. Consequently, they could have a chance to start their lives again from the beginning. To summarize, I entirely support that teens should attend a talk given by ex-prisoners in order to raise their awareness of the consequences of breaking the law.
There is always an argument between
people
, about a person’s personality after
being released
from
prison
.
Some
people
who believe in humanity,
think
that it is a
good
idea
to
use
these
people
to confront
teenagers
with the reality of life. In my concern, it is somehow even necessary.
However
, necessary precautions need to
be taken
.

It is obvious that when someone becomes a criminal and goes to jail, will never be who he or she was
before
.
However
, this
change
can be in a
good
way. To illustrate, if there be an opportunity for a person in
prison
to find
his or her
way, and if the
government
try to rehabilitate prisoners by doing somethings like providing education and a
good
library in
prison
, there will be a might for prisoners to
start
a wonderful life and become a well experienced individual after
prison
time. Definitely, this person can teach this precious experience, which he paid a lot for, to the community and
especially
to
teenagers
.
Consequently
, in future
teenagers
will not try to do that kind of behavior and this will uproot a problem.

In addition
, most
teenagers
seem to not know all the
negative
consequences of being in jail.
For instance
, after being free from jail, law-violators may suffer from prejudice or discrimination from ordinary
people
in the community.
So
obviously
,
only
ex-prisoners can
tell
others how it feels.
On the other hand
, it is even
good
for ex-prisoners. Telling their story to others will give them a
good
feeling and
help
them to be more
accepted
in the community.
Consequently
, they could have a chance to
start
their
lives
again from the beginning.

To summarize
, I
entirely
support that teens should attend a talk
given
by ex-prisoners in order to raise their awareness of the consequences of breaking the law.
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IELTS essay Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
304 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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