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Some people who have been imprison, become good citizens later,and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangerous of commuting a crime.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people who have been imprison, become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangerous of commuting a crime. J20B
In the current scenerio, crime is increased dramatically. Some people think that after jail criminals become good citizens but others debate that they are the best people to talk to youngsters about the threats of commiting a crime. I partially agree to given notion and I will discuss my views in the paragraph below. One convincing reason is that why people after custody become a best person because they are well experienced and they already knew about the result of bad deeds which they was suffered during lock up so after completion the punishment they aware to other youngsters that is very dangerous. As, adoscents fall prey in bad deeds or commited crime due to this they face number of consequences in their life. As a result, they will spoil their whole life due to this some people think about the criminal person in a wrong way. Critics of above argue that it is the responsibility of academic teaches they should provide knowledge about criminal activities and its consequences to youngsters so they should aware them. For example, a news published in the newspaper, "The Turbine "revealed that number of universities and institutions visited in lock up with students and prepared a report about the criminal history and their result which they faced in jail. Summing up, although criminals should become a good citizen after punishment in lock up but its duty of teachers and government is that they should aware to all students about crime.
In the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
Possible spelling mistake found.
scenerio
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
is increased
dramatically
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that after jail
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
become
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
citizens
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
others debate that they are the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to talk to youngsters about the threats of
Possible spelling mistake found.
commiting
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
. I
partially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
notion and I will discuss my views in the paragraph below.

One convincing reason is that why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
after custody become
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
best person
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are well
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
experienced and
they already knew about the result of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
deeds which they
Use third-person plural verb with 'they': "are", "were".
was
suffered during lock up
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
after completion the punishment they aware to other youngsters
that is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
. As,
Possible spelling mistake found.
adoscents
fall prey in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
deeds or
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "committed", the past tense form of the verb 'commit'?
commited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
due to this they face number of consequences in their life.
As a result
, they will spoil their whole life due to this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
person in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
way.

Critics of above argue that it is the responsibility of academic teaches they should provide knowledge about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
activities and its
The usual preposition to use after "consequences" is not "to". Did you mean "consequences of", "consequences for", or "consequences on"?
consequences to
youngsters
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they
It seems that a verb or adverb has been misspelled or is missing here.
should aware
them.
For example
,
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "news".
a news
published in the newspaper,
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
The Turbine
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
revealed that number of universities and institutions visited in lock up with students and prepared a report about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminal
history and their result which they faced in jail.

Summing up, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
criminals
should become a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
citizen after punishment in lock up
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
its duty of teachers and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
is that they should aware to all students about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
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IELTS essay Some people who have been imprison, become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangerous of commuting a crime.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
246 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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