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Some believe that more action should be taken to prevent crime, while others feel that crime is being tackled effectively now. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Some believe that more action should be taken to prevent crime, while others feel that crime is being tackled effectively now. rVY2
Commiting a crime and how to prevent people to turn to it is a very important subject in many countries. Although it is thought by some people that crime is under control efficiently, others believe that more actions are required to stop crimes. In my opinion, the crime rate is still high, especially between young people. Some people believe that crime rate does not change for a long time and so they argue that it is under control. Indeed, people are looking at the news and the number of people in prison. These people beieve that there exist enough rules and laws to prevent crime and governments pose enormous amount of fines to stop all kinds of crime. If one's looking at the evidences and graphs which shows the crime rates during the past years for instance, they underestand that the legislated rules are being effective to stop crimminals. So, some people support the idea that the crime is efficiently under control and criminals no longer pose a threat to the society. Others believe that more actions are required in regards with the crimes. Juvenile delinquency is growing and government should pay more attention to youth. If governments are willing to reduce crime between young people, they should legislate strict laws and educate them from their early age. For example, research studies reveal that the number of teenagers between 15 to 19 who turn to crime are growing. According to these studies, 10 percent of the crimes includes crimminal offences. As a result, deterrent actions such as laws and strict rules as well as raising youth awareness about the penalties and consequences of crimes are required. Therefore, further actions are still needed to be performed in order to reduce the crime rate and make everything under control, particularly juvenile delinquency. In conclusion, even though it is though that we live in a safe society and no further actions are required to stop criminals, if people take a look at the crime rate between the youth, they will realize that more hard works are required. In my opinion, enormous actions are needed to teach young people and prevent them from violence and aggressive behaviour.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Commiting
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
and how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
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people
to turn to it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
subject in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries. Although it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
is under
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
control
efficiently
, others believe that more actions are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
required
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
. In my opinion, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
is
still
high,
especially
between young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
does not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
for a long
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
time and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they argue that it is under
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
control
.
Indeed
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are looking at the news and the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in prison. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Possible spelling mistake found.
beieve
that there exist
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and laws to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
pose enormous amount of fines to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stop
all kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
. If one's looking at the evidences and graphs which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
during the past years
for instance
, they
Possible spelling mistake found.
underestand
that the legislated
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
are being effective to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stop
Possible spelling mistake found.
crimminals
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
support the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
is
efficiently
under
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
control
and criminals no longer pose a threat to the society.

Others believe that more actions are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
required
in regards with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
. Juvenile delinquency is growing and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should pay more attention to youth. If
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
are willing to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
between young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, they should legislate strict laws and educate them from their early age.
For example
, research studies reveal that the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 15 and 19".
between 15 to 19
who turn to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
are growing. According to these studies, 10 percent of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
includes
Possible spelling mistake found.
crimminal
Possible spelling mistake. 'offences' is British English.
offences
.
As a result
, deterrent actions such as laws and strict
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
as well
as raising youth awareness about the penalties and consequences of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
required
.
Therefore
,
further
actions are
still
needed to
be performed
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
everything under
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
control
,
particularly
juvenile delinquency.

In conclusion
,
even though
it is though that we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a safe society and no
further
actions are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
required
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stop
criminals, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
take a look at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
between the youth, they will realize that more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
works are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
required
. In my opinion, enormous actions
are needed
to teach young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
them from violence and aggressive
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
.
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IELTS essay Some believe that more action should be taken to prevent crime, while others feel that crime is being tackled effectively now.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
363 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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