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Some people think watching TV and films makes children more creative. Others think that it can actually lower their creativity. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

There is no doubt that television is the main entertainment device in many homes. If we compare it 10 or 20 years ago, we find that nowadays almost every home has a TV. According to that the people were divided into two groups: the first believed that when children watched TV and movies this would lead to an increase in creativity. On the contrary, there is a feeling that it can reduce creativity. I totally agree with the first point of view because if they exploited it by correct way will generate new ideas and information. However, Television can help to gives a lot of creative ideas and messages to youngster if they watched the useful channels, For instance: Discovery, BCC and National Geographic. Also, Families should set limit on time they spent in front of it because it can caused many of diseases to kids. Also, it provides very valuable concepts like bring family to living room to see movies or series that drop a funny time with family members. On other hand, Parents can use the educational channels or programs that teach kids number, letters and other subject. When parents be able to sit with their children can benefit positively from use television. Also, most kids can’t able to visit forests or sees a giraffes in the wild, they can see on TV. Thankfully, there is an educational minded producer they can give us many of shows that allow to viewers to see amazing innovations, experiments, animals and other things. Moreover kids and adult can beneficial from this type of media and learn new things. Anyway, Television can be a spoiler, if we don’t set limit on the time spent in front of it. Youth whose spend a numerous hours watching TV that makes them lazy and effectiveness In sometimes, it can cause a big large number of diseases like overweight and learned them some bad habits. Children are influence by people they see on it. Obviously, it can have a positive result, but it can be negative too. So parents should be careful of what their sons and daughter see. To sum up, Television as anything in our life, it has 2 different faces one useful and other harmful. So we should know the pros and cons of it, and put some rules to avoid its disadvantages. Truly, Media can have a positive effect on kids, but it is up to the parents.
There is no doubt that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
is the main entertainment device in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many


homes. If we compare it 10 or 20 years ago, we find that nowadays almost every

home has a TV. According to that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
were divided
into two groups: the

first
believed that when children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watched
TV and movies this would lead to an

increase in creativity.
On the contrary
, there is a feeling that it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce


creativity. I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
first
point of view
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if they exploited it by

correct way will generate new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
and information.

However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Television
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
The verb after “to” should be in the base form: “give”.
gives
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
creative
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
and messages to

youngster if they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watched
the useful channels,
For instance
: Discovery, BCC and

National Geographic.
Also
, Families should set limit on time they spent in front of

it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it can
The modal verb ‘can’ requires the verb’s base form.
caused
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of diseases to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
.
Also
, it provides
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
valuable

concepts like bring family to living room to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
movies or series that drop a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
funny


time with family members.

On
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the educational channels or programs that teach

kids number, letters and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
subject.
“When” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
be able to sit with their

children can benefit
positively
from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
.
Also
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
can’t able to

visit forests or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sees
The plural noun “giraffes” cannot be used with the article “a”. Did you mean “a giraffe” or “giraffes”?
a giraffes
in the wild, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
on TV.
Thankfully
, there is

an
Make sure that the adjective ‘educational’ is correct. Possibly, it should be an adverb (typically ~ly) that modifies ‘minded’. Possibly, it should be the first word in a compound adjective (hyphenated adjective). Possibly, it is correct.
educational minded
producer they can give us
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
to

viewers to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
amazing innovations, experiments, animals and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
things.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Moreover
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
and adult can beneficial from this type of media and learn new

things.

Anyway,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Television
can be a spoiler, if we don’t set limit on the time spent in front

of it. Youth whose spend
The plural noun “hours” cannot be used with the article “a”. Did you mean “a numerous hour” or “numerous hours”?
a numerous hours
watching TV that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them lazy and

effectiveness In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
, it can cause a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
large number of diseases like

overweight and learned them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
habits. Children are influence by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people


they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
on it.
Obviously
, it can have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
result,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
too.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
should be careful of what their sons and daughter
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
.

To sum up,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Television
as anything in our life, it has 2
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
faces one useful

and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
harmful.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
we should know the pros and cons of it, and put
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules


to avoid its disadvantages.
Truly
, Media can have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is

up to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
.
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IELTS essay Some people think watching TV and films makes children more creative. Others think that it can actually lower their creativity.

Essay
  American English
7 paragraphs
406 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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