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Some people think that wild animals should not be kept in zoos. Others believe that there are good reasons for having zoos. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

It is irrefultable that keeping animals has changed enormously during the last few decades owing to the huge impact of the pet lovers. Some people believe that keeping pets in zoos is not much better than abandoning them in the nature or giving them to ones who love pets. As evidence of this, they point to improvement in people's feelings who usually are suffering from mental disorders and the general increases in the standard of life for them. Furthermore, they argue that the feeling of pets' freedom would be eliminated after puting them into the cages and the talk about zoos that transformed their feelings during years. On the other hand, it can be also argued that keeping pets in zoos have had a negetive imapct on their performances as a animal. For example, If you hunter birds from the forests, they would not fly in the sky when you make them free from their jail after many years. In addition, molest from all the behaviors in today's zoos may have reduced the varieties of animals in the wild world. Having access to more pets in order to hunter them cannot compensate the peril of death. One reason of this loss is that when you take a wild animal from their cage incorrectly after a long time, it would attack you angrily because of staying in zoos for several years. In conclusion, I think there is some evidence to suggest that some of zoos in the modern world have effected on pets in a negetive way, especially in terms of their feelings. It is clear that most of pets which are living with a human have been good for the majority of mental disorders. Nevertheless, I feel we need to ensure that keeping pets in zoos can be sustained by them and shared more in the future.
It is
Possible spelling mistake found.
irrefultable
that keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
enormously
during the last few decades owing to the huge impact of the pet lovers.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
in zoos is not much better than abandoning them in the nature or giving them to ones who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
. As evidence of this, they point to improvement in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feelings
who
usually
are suffering from mental disorders and the general increases in the standard of life for them.
Furthermore
, they argue that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feeling
of pets' freedom would
be eliminated
after
Possible spelling mistake found.
puting
them into the cages and the talk about zoos that transformed their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feelings
during years.

On the other hand
, it can be
also
argued that keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
in zoos have had a
Possible spelling mistake found.
negetive
Possible spelling mistake found.
imapct
on their performances as
Use “an” instead of ‘a’ if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. ‘an article’, ‘an hour’.
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
.
For example
, If
Do not use a noun immediately after the pronoun ‘you’. Use a verb or an adverb, or possibly some other part of speech.
you hunter
birds from the forests, they would not
fly
in the sky when you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them free from their jail after
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years.
In addition
, molest from all the behaviors in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's zoos may have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
the varieties of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
in the wild world.

Having access to more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
in order to hunter them cannot compensate the peril of death. One reason of this loss is that when you take a wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
from their cage
incorrectly
after a long time, it would attack you
angrily
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of staying in zoos for several years.

In conclusion
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
evidence to suggest that
After ‘some of’, you should use ‘the’ (“some of the zoos”) or simply say “some zoos”.
some of zoos
in the modern world have effected on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
in a
Possible spelling mistake found.
negetive
way,
especially
in terms of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feelings
. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that most of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
which are living with a human have been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for the majority of mental disorders.
Nevertheless
, I feel we need to ensure that keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pets
in zoos can
be sustained
by them and shared more in the future.
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IELTS essay Some people think that wild animals should not be kept in zoos. Others believe that there are good reasons for having zoos.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
307 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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