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Some people think that to be successful you need to get a university knowledge whereas other says it is not true. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

Some people think that to be successful you need to get a university knowledge whereas other says it is not true. k178
Success is a very subjective term. In today's era defination of success differ from person to person. Some people succeed through their university education, some succeed by their inborn talents, some are succeed through reality shows and some make fame by their hardwork and kindness. Moreover, i am partially agree with the given statement which, i shall describe in following paragraphs. On one hand, university education has it's own importance, Without university education you can't succeed in Medical, research and law as well teaching. Moreover, University knowledge gives you a good friend and the knowledge helps you to build good career and get good job. In addition, it give you extra knowledge and good business partners. On other hand, there are many people who don't get any education from college and university but, they are happy with their financially succeed life. For example, Gautam Adani, he is India's leading businessman and one of India's richest person. In addition, Sports also gives you a respect and fame. For instance, M. S Dhoni is popular cricketer in the world. There are many people who not attend ang college but, they succeed with hard work and talent. Some are famous overnight in Reality shows based on their talent like dancing, singing. Many people also succeed on social media by creating video and post on social media and gain fame. In addition Stand-up comedy is also give fame and respect to many people. To sum-up, to succeed, it is not compulsory to get university knowledge except some particular fields. People get succes through their in-born talent, hard work and by using social media.
Success is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
subjective term. In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's era
Possible spelling mistake found.
defination
of success differ from person to person.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
succeed
through their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
succeed
by their inborn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talents
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Did you mean "ares"?
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
succeed
through reality
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
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fame
by their
Possible spelling mistake found.
hardwork
and kindness.
Moreover
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
am
partially
Consider using a past participle here: "agreed".
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
statement which,
Did you mean "I"?
i
shall
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
in following paragraphs.

On one hand,
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university
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education
has
Did you mean "its" (possessive pronoun) instead of 'it's' (=it is)?
it's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
importance, Without
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university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
you can't
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succeed
in Medical, research and law
as well
teaching.
Moreover
,
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University
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gives
you a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
friend and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
you to build
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good
career and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
job.
In addition
, it
Did you mean "gives"?
give
you extra
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knowledge
and
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good
business partners.

On other hand, there are
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many
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people
who don't
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get
any
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education
from college and
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university
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but
, they are happy with their
financially
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succeed
life.
For example
, Gautam
Possible spelling mistake found.
Adani
, he is India's leading businessman and one of India's richest person.
In addition
, Sports
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gives
you a respect and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fame
.
For instance
, M. S
Possible spelling mistake found.
Dhoni
is popular cricketer in the world.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who not attend ang college
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but
, they
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succeed
with
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hard
work and
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talent
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
are
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famous
overnight in Reality
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
based on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
like dancing, singing.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
succeed
on social media by creating video and post on social media and gain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fame
. In
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
addition
Stand-up comedy is
also
Consider using a past participle here: "given".
give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fame
and respect to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

To sum-up, to
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succeed
, it is not compulsory to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
except
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
particular fields.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
Possible spelling mistake found.
succes
through their in-born
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work and by using social media.
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IELTS essay Some people think that to be successful you need to get a university knowledge whereas other says it is not true.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
269 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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