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Some people think that space exploration is a waste of time and money and it is better for mankind to continue to explore the planet on which we live. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people think that space exploration is a waste of time and money and it is better for mankind to continue to explore the planet on which we live. XGDNw
Several people are of the opinion that space expedition is a misuse of resources and it would be more beneficial to carry on with exploring the Earth. Although, space researches are expensive and time-consuming, they can be an answer to our future problems like over-population, whereas, exploring our own planet answers our current issues making resources available in abundance. Therefore, I concur with the idea of conducting both the researches in parallel. The investment that goes into a cosmic expedition is not a piece of cake. It takes a lot of chunk out of a country’s budget which otherwise could have been used for better developmental projects. However, the world is not ignorant of the future threats that stand before us like over-population and pollution. For instance, the rate at which our stratosphere is depleting is extremely alarming. According to a report by the United Nations, the population on the planet earth would escalate to approximately 12 billion people. Consequently, there will be crises of shortage of clean air, drinking water, and of accommodating people. Thus, cosmic expeditions provide us a potential alternate habitat, which might play a vital role in safeguarding mankind. On the other hand, it is impossible to turn our sight from the current problem of making resources to rapidly increasing population. To make sure that everyone has abundance of natural resources available to meet our current requirements is an apex priority. For example, in order to feed the growing population, it is important to cultivate crops, which needs sources of fresh water to be made available to the fields. Thus, it is important to invest in discovery of more sources of soft water or technology that treats of hard water into soft water accessible for irrigation. Hence, it is particularly important to explore our planet as well to make the ends meet. In my perspective, it is extremely important to impart equal gravity to both the researches, rather than drawing a competitive line of one over the other, as both of them are in the interest of mankind. For this reason, I would, reiterate that cosmos might be an answer to our future problems, whereas, exploring our own planet might solve our immediate issues.
Several
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are of the opinion that space expedition is a misuse of resources and it would be more beneficial to carry on with exploring the Earth. Although, space researches are expensive and time-consuming, they can be an answer to our future problems like over-population, whereas, exploring our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
planet
answers our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
issues making resources available in abundance.
Therefore
, I concur with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of conducting both the researches in parallel.

The investment that goes into a cosmic expedition is not a piece of cake. It takes
Possible agreement error. The noun chunk seems to be countable; consider using: "a lot of chunks".
a lot of chunk
out of a country’s budget which
otherwise
could have been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for better developmental projects.
However
, the world is not ignorant of the future threats that stand
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
us like over-population and pollution.
For instance
, the rate at which our stratosphere is depleting is
extremely
alarming. According to a report by the United Nations, the population on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
planet
earth would escalate to approximately 12 billion
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
Consequently
, there will be crises of shortage of clean air, drinking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
, and of accommodating
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
Thus
, cosmic expeditions provide us a potential alternate habitat, which might play a vital role in safeguarding mankind.

On the other hand
, it is impossible to turn our sight from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
problem of making resources to
rapidly
increasing population. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure that everyone has abundance of natural resources available to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
requirements is an apex priority.
For example
, in order to feed the growing population, it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
to cultivate crops, which needs sources of fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
to
be made
available to the fields.
Thus
, it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
to invest in discovery of more sources of soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
or technology that treats of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
into soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
accessible for irrigation.
Hence
, it is
particularly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
to explore our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
planet
as well
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the ends
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
.

In my perspective, it is
extremely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
to impart equal gravity to both the researches,
rather
than drawing a competitive line of one over the other, as both of them are in the interest of mankind.
For this reason
, I would, reiterate that cosmos might be an answer to our future problems, whereas, exploring our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
planet
might solve our immediate issues.
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IELTS essay Some people think that space exploration is a waste of time and money and it is better for mankind to continue to explore the planet on which we live.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
368 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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