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Some people think that modern technology is making people more sociable, while others think it is making them less sociable. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that modern technology is making people more sociable, while others think it is making them less sociable. LeOK
It is often argued that the contemporary technology makes human to interact more while others disagree and think that it is not. While the development of technology helps man to be social, it reduces the face-to-face interaction between each other. I believe, the use of modern devices makes people less responsive and closer. On the one hand, now technical field arises to its higher level and we can access everything in our finger point. The invention of mobile phone itself gives a new face to the human life. Today we have enormous applications that can install in our gadgets and it helps to make more connection with our dear ones. For instance, media sites like Facebook, Telegram, Watsapp helps to connect with our beloved ones even if they are very far from us. Also, during this pandemic situation most of the corporate uses online meeting platforms like Zoom, Google meet and it helps them to communicate from their home itself. This has made it very convenient to stay at their own house and be more social. On the other hand, increased use of modern technology makes people less interactive. Everyone got stuck into their gadgets and now a days its rare to see affection between family members. Due to the invention of certain application, we do not need to go out for our basic needs. For instance, through mobile applications like swiggy, Zomato we can order our favourite food from any restaurants at affordable price. This made less interaction between friends and people. To conclude, although the invention of technology is good for the society, it certainly affect the attachment between friends, family and collegues.
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argued that the contemporary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
human to interact more while others disagree and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is not. While the development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
to be social, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
the face-to-face interaction between each other. I believe, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of modern devices
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
less responsive and closer.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
technical field arises to its higher
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
level and
we can access everything in our finger point. The invention of mobile phone itself gives a new face to the human life.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
we have enormous applications that can install in our gadgets and it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
more connection with our dear ones.
For instance
, media sites like Facebook, Telegram,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Watsapp
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to connect with our beloved ones even if they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
far from us.
Also
, during this pandemic situation most of the corporate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
online meeting platforms like Zoom, Google
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
and it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
them to communicate from their home itself. This has made it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
convenient to stay at their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
and be more social.

On the other hand
, increased
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
less interactive. Everyone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
stuck into their gadgets and
Did you mean "nowadays"?
now a days
Did you mean "it's" (="it is") instead of 'its' (possessive pronoun)?
its
rare to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
affection between family members. Due to the invention of certain application, we do not need to go out for our basic needs.
For instance
, through mobile applications like
Possible spelling mistake found.
swiggy
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Zomato
we can order our
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
food from any restaurants at affordable price. This made less interaction between friends and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

To conclude
, although the invention of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for the society, it
certainly
Did you mean "affects"?
affect
the attachment between friends, family and
Possible spelling mistake found.
collegues
.

IELTS essay Some people think that modern technology is making people more sociable, while others think it is making them less sociable.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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