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Some people think that its advertisements have a good effects on persons and businesses and another thing that it is a negative trend discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people think that its advertisements have a good effects on persons and businesses and another thing that it is a negative trend discuss both views and give your opinion yPEeV
A few people opine that commercial have good effect on the forces and business organisations whereas, others postulate that they are negative. In this essay I will elaborate both the points along with my opinion. In my opinion, advertisements helps to spread awareness about products to the individuals. It provides all information regarding a product. For instance, if a person wants to buy mobile, so he can compare among the varieties via adverts and select cheap and best model as advertisements offer various choices. In terms of business, it help in expansion of business to a large extent because people get attracted towards products through advertisements. For example, individuals from distant the places get aware about products and their availability at other places which increases sale of business. As a effect, it develops the nation by providing good quality products at fair prices. On the other hand, it has bad effects that it manipulate people toward some fake products. By get attracted through fairness cream it persuade women that buying a product will make them happy, use glamorous, successful people always target to children also. To cite an example, Varun Dhawan give advertisement on Maggi, by get attracted from him, his followers also start to eat Maggi it results in causing unhealthy lifestyle. So advert must be regulated and ban un appropriate material. In conclusion, advertising have positive effects on masses and organisations or it helps to expand business or spread awareness among individuals to get aware about products and its bad effect is that it can manipulate people towards some fake products.
A few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
opine
The verb 'have' is plural. Did you mean: "that commercial has"? Did you use a verb instead of a noun?
that commercial have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
on the forces and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
whereas, others postulate that they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
. In this essay I will elaborate both the points along with my opinion.

In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to spread awareness about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
to the individuals. It provides all information regarding a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
.
For instance
, if a person wants to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
mobile,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
he can compare among the varieties via adverts and select
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
and best model as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
offer various choices. In terms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
, it
Did you mean "helps"?
help
in expansion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
to a large extent
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
attracted towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
.
For example
, individuals from distant the places
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
aware about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and their availability at other places which increases sale of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
. As
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
, it develops the nation by providing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
prices.

On the other hand
, it has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
effects that it manipulate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
toward
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fake
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. By
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
attracted through fairness cream it persuade women that buying a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them happy,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
glamorous, successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
always target to children
also
. To cite an example,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Varun
Possible spelling mistake found.
Dhawan
give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
on
Possible spelling mistake found.
Maggi
, by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
attracted from him, his followers
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to eat
Possible spelling mistake found.
Maggi
it results in causing unhealthy lifestyle.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
advert
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be regulated
and ban
Possible spelling mistake found.
un
appropriate material.

In conclusion
, advertising have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects on masses and
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
or it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to expand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
or spread awareness among individuals to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
aware about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
and its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
is that it can manipulate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
towards
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fake
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
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IELTS essay Some people think that its advertisements have a good effects on persons and businesses and another thing that it is a negative trend discuss both views and give your opinion

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
263 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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