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Some people think that it is better to leave their work and living opportunities. Others believe that it is better to stay in their homes. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that it is better to leave their work and living opportunities. Others believe that it is better to stay in their homes. 92On
In this era of increasing globalization, migrating from rural to urban areas has been changed significantly. Yet, it is thought by some that majority of individuals are used to leaving their hometown due to the job and life opportunities, while others claim that they are completely against to this notion. In this essay, I am going to discuss these views according to some examples before a position is declared. On the one hand, one of the most obvious reasons why this is a rapid growing trend is that a numerous people intend to have a different environmental background. What I mean by this is that they shift cities in order to employ as a doctor or policeman, in which they are paid with higher salaries. For example, residents of several Asian countries just migrate to Western far away places, can be a tangible point to prove my view. Further, another reason to be taken into a consideration is that rural areas do not fully provide you with modernized appliances, and electricity, gas and heat water, that almost exist in an urban city. Therefore, despite being a struggling move, people consider shifting to a developed area to upgrade themselves and earn more money. On the other hand, on convincing point against this attitude is that people do not struggle and wish to live in their house where they have been residing since their childhood. This kind of individuals prefer piece to money. To illustrate this, many humans from semi-urban areas enjoy doing farming in their whole life and do not want to move anywhere. To sum up, for the reasons mentioned above, it seems to me that individuals should migrate or choose to stay a particular place by making important circumstances. If they find home city more comforting and satisfying, they should relax their life in the same directions.
In this era of increasing globalization, migrating from rural to urban
areas
has been
changed
significantly
.
Yet
, it is
thought
by
some
that majority of individuals are
used
to leaving their hometown due to the job and life opportunities, while others claim that they are completely against to this notion. In this essay, I am going to discuss these views according to
some
examples
before
a position
is declared
.

On the one hand, one of the most obvious reasons why this is a rapid growing trend is that a numerous
people
intend to have a
different
environmental background. What I mean by this is that they shift cities in order to employ as a doctor or policeman, in which they
are paid
with higher salaries.
For example
, residents of several Asian countries
just
migrate to Western far away places, can be a tangible point to prove my view.
Further
, another reason to
be taken
into a consideration is that rural
areas
do not
fully
provide you with modernized appliances, and electricity, gas and heat water, that almost exist in an urban city.
Therefore
, despite being a struggling
move
,
people
consider shifting to a developed
area
to upgrade themselves and earn more money.

On the other hand
, on convincing point against this attitude is that
people
do not struggle and wish to
live
in their
house
where they have been residing since their childhood. This kind of individuals prefer piece to money. To illustrate this,
many
humans from semi-urban
areas
enjoy
doing farming
in their whole life and do not want to
move
anywhere.

To sum up, for the reasons mentioned above, it seems to me that individuals should migrate or choose to stay a particular place by making
important
circumstances. If they find home city more comforting and satisfying, they should relax their life in the same directions.
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IELTS essay Some people think that it is better to leave their work and living opportunities. Others believe that it is better to stay in their homes.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
308 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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