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Some people think that cultural traditions are destroyed when they are used as money-making attractions aimed at tourists. Others believe that this is the only way to save such traditions in the world today. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is indeed true tourists are as boom for countries economy growth. Some individuals reckon that making money on tourists Intrections lead to destroyed older culture and traditional value of countries whilst others think that it is beneficial effects on countries. I believe that it has more beneficial effects on nations than deverse effects. This essay will disuss both views along with my opinion. To begin with, there are number of reasons why making-money on tourists Intrestions is beneficial for countries cultural and traditional values. First and foremost, promote culture and traditional all around the world. To elaborate, when tourists are come any country they brought souvenirs as a memory of that country and after returning their own country they tell about our culture and traditional
It is
indeed
true
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
are as boom for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
economy growth.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
individuals reckon that making money on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
Intrections lead to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
older culture and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
value of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
whilst others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is beneficial effects on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. I believe that it has more beneficial effects on nations than deverse effects. This essay will disuss both views along with my opinion. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are number of reasons why making-money on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
Intrestions is beneficial for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
cultural and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
values.
First
and foremost, promote culture and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
all around the world. To elaborate, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
they brought souvenirs as a memory of that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and after returning their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
about our culture and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional

IELTS essay Some people think that cultural traditions are destroyed when they are used as money-making attractions aimed at tourists. Others believe that this is the only way to save such traditions in the world today.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
125 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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