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Some people think that approaching with TV and computer game are not the same good for childrent as reading stories by book.

Some people think that approaching with TV and computer game are not the same good for childrent as reading stories by book. 2Klpj
Some people think that approaching with TV and computer game are not the same good for childrent as reading stories by book. I am not completely agree with this opinion. So that, this essay will indicade the importance of book in the children’s growth and the reasons why reading stories is vital, but not all and it can not alternate totally. Nobody can deny that reading stories plays a vital roles to human’s life, specially children. It helps increase imagical and reading ability and brain development through pictures. Moreover, reading stories from books prevent from early exposuring to techology which makes children become more lazy and lack of initiatives. Of course, it prohibites the eye problems which are one of the most common issues in chilren today. However, the books are limited about information and not various pictures so it are usually not attractive to children. Reading stories through watching TV and playing computer game will be good if children do not use beyond limitation. Approaching with lechnologies on times helps children not only grow generally but also to advertise. The The latest knowledes are usually updated on the internet, early reaching out helps children to be more intelligent. Summary, each method has its own advantages and disadvantages. Therefore, children should be combined both in reading stories to promote the children’s growth.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that approaching with TV and computer game are not the same
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for
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childrent
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stories
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
. I am not completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that, this essay will
Possible spelling mistake found.
indicade
the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
growth and the reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stories
is vital,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not all and it can not alternate
totally
.

Nobody can deny that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stories
plays a vital
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "role"?
roles
to human’s life,
specially
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
increase
Possible spelling mistake found.
imagical
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
ability and brain development through pictures.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stories
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
from early
Possible spelling mistake found.
exposuring
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
techology
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
become more lazy and lack of initiatives.
Of course
, it
Possible spelling mistake found.
prohibites
the eye problems which are one of the most common issues in
Possible spelling mistake found.
chilren
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
.

However
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
are limited
about information and not various pictures
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it
Did you mean "is"?
are
usually
not attractive to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stories
through watching TV and playing computer game will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
beyond limitation. Approaching with
Possible spelling mistake found.
lechnologies
on times
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
grow
generally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to advertise.
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "The" or "The" is left.
The The
latest
Possible spelling mistake found.
knowledes
are
usually
updated on the internet, early reaching out
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to be more intelligent.

Summary, each method has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
advantages and disadvantages.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
should
be combined
both in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stories
to promote the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
growth.

IELTS essay Some people think that approaching with TV and computer game are not the same good for childrent as reading stories by book.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
222 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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