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Some people think secondary school students should study international news as one of their subjects. Other people say this is a waste of valuable school time. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.5

Some people think secondary school students should study international news as one of their subjects. Other people say this is a waste of valuable school time. v. 5
Different people have different opinions about the subjects that should be taught by educational institutions. While some people opine that international news should be taught in secondary schools as one of the subject, others think that it is not a great idea and other subjects are more crucial. I strongly support the former idea and discuss it in detail. People who oppose the idea of introducing current affair as a school subject think that there are more important subjects such as basic computer knowledge and teaching pupils how to speak the English language because these can give practical knowledge which can help them in future by generating better job opportunities and improve the probability of bagging one. Additionally, they also think that adding a new subject would increase the pressure of studies for students who already have quite an overwhelming number of subjects to cope up with. To support the argument, consider the example of Italy, where the number of children who failed in a semester was increased by 20% when a school introduced two new subjects. On the contrary, I strongly believe that everyone should be aware about their surroundings, including children. Hence, introducing international news subjects in schools can potentially them more informative about incidents happening across the globe. In addition, this would also make them ready of any adverse situation. For instance, reading news can help avoid the spread of some deadly viruses such as Covid-19 and be prepared to fight against it. This can also educate their respective families about how to prevent it. Thirdly, this can all generate the habit of reading the newspaper on a daily base which is quite a good habit and would also improve the reading ability. In conclusion, though some people think that studying news as a subject in schools is a waste as this can increase pressure of studies on children, I believe that it is a great idea due to above stated reasons.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
opinions about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
that should
be taught
by educational institutions. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
opine that international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
should
be taught
in secondary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
as one of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
, others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that it is not a great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
idea
and other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
are more crucial. I
strongly
support the former
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
idea
and discuss it in detail.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
who oppose the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
idea
of introducing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
affair as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that there are more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
such as basic computer knowledge and teaching pupils how to speak the English language
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
these can give practical knowledge which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them in future by generating better job opportunities and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the probability of bagging one.
Additionally
, they
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that adding a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
would increase the pressure of studies for students who already have quite an overwhelming number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
to cope up with. To support the argument, consider the example of Italy, where the number of children who failed in a semester
was increased
by 20% when a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
introduced two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
subjects.

On the contrary
, I
strongly
believe that everyone should be aware about their surroundings, including children.
Hence
, introducing international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
can
potentially
them more informative about incidents happening across the globe.
In addition
, this would
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them ready of any adverse situation.
For instance
, reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
avoid the spread of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
deadly viruses such as Covid-19 and
be prepared
to fight against it. This can
also
educate their respective families about how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
it.
Thirdly
, this can all generate the habit of reading the newspaper on a daily base which is quite a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
habit and would
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the reading ability.

In conclusion
, though
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
is a waste as this can increase pressure of studies on children, I believe that it is a great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
idea
due to above stated reasons.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
Learn a language, and you’ll avoid a war.
Arab Proverb

IELTS essay Some people think secondary school students should study international news as one of their subjects. Other people say this is a waste of valuable school time. v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
325 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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