Search
Vocabularying
Listening
Reading
1. Academic
2. General
Writing
1. IELTSWriting Checker
2. IELTS Writing Samples
Speaking

Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.

Some people think personal happiness is directly related to economic success. To what extent you agree or disagree?

Some people think personal happiness is directly related to economic success. G3rBB

It is sometimes argued that economic success has a strong impact on personal happiness. To some extent, I agree it may be true in the case of some societies. However, I also believed that there are other factors such as health, friends, and family. On the one hand, the opinion that a wealthy man can buy pleasure is attractive for several reasons. If one person is extremely rich, which means they can live in a luxurious life. Although money cannot directly purchase happiness, it can bring them satisfaction that makes them delighted. For example, with economic success, we can afford a big house full of advanced equipment, expensive interior, or entertainment options. On the other hand, there are a variety of reasons why I believe that such a healthy relationship can give us true happiness. First of all, family is considerably vital for everyone because family is the only that stands with us in any situation. For instance, one faces a big challenge in his career, he can easily get over it if his family is standing with him. One factor that also has effect on our joy is friends. We cannot live alone forever, so we need some friends who can share everything such as the sadness or happiness. There is a truth that a poor person with some real friends is far happier than a rich one with no friends. In conclusion, while some believe that money can buy happiness, I am the opinion that there are other elements that bring us pleasure. We do not have to be very wealthy but at least we need a healthy relationship with family and friends.

It is This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :in some instances
sometimes
 argued that economic success has a strong impact on personal You use this word too often, consider replacing it withprosperitypeace of mindcontentmentenjoymentjoyglee
happiness
. To This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
 extent, I This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :acquiesce
agree
 it may be true in the case of This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
 societies. However
, I also
 believed that there are other factors such as health, You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcolleagueacquaintancebuddyassociatecompanionroommate
friends
, and family.

On the one hand, the opinion that a wealthy This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualresidentcitizen
man
 can This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :purchase
buy
 pleasure is attractive for several reasons. If one person is extremely
 rich, which means they can This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :reside
live
 in a luxurious life. Although money cannot directly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :acquire
purchase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withprosperitypeace of mindcontentmentenjoymentjoyglee
happiness
, it can bring them satisfaction that This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :createsconstructsmanufacturesproduces
makes
 them delighted. For example
, with economic success, we can afford a This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:hugeenormousgiganticvast
big
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :residence
house
 full of advanced equipment, expensive interior, or entertainment options.

On the other hand
, there are a variety of reasons why I believe that such a healthy relationship can give us true You use this word too often, consider replacing it withprosperitypeace of mindcontentmentenjoymentjoyglee
happiness
. This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".First
First of all
, You use this word too often, consider replacing it withclantribegrouppeoplehousehousehold
family
 is considerably
 vital for everyone This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:due to the factin light of the fact thatowing to the fact that
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withclantribegrouppeoplehousehousehold
family
 is the This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :exclusively
only
 that stands with us in any situation. For instance
, one faces a This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:hugeenormousgiganticvast
big
 challenge in his career, he can easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :acquire
get
 over it if his You use this word too often, consider replacing it withclantribegrouppeoplehousehousehold
family
 is standing with him. One factor that also
 has effect on our joy is You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcolleagueacquaintancebuddyassociatecompanionroommate
friends
. We cannot This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :reside
live
 alone forever, This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:consequently
so
 we need This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcolleagueacquaintancebuddyassociatecompanionroommate
friends
 who can share everything such as the sadness or You use this word too often, consider replacing it withprosperitypeace of mindcontentmentenjoymentjoyglee
happiness
. There is a truth that a poor person with This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
 real You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcolleagueacquaintancebuddyassociatecompanionroommate
friends
 is far happier than a rich one with no friends.

In conclusion
, while This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
 believe that money can This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :purchase
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withprosperitypeace of mindcontentmentenjoymentjoyglee
happiness
, I am the opinion that there are other elements that bring us pleasure. We do not This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:ought to
have to
 be This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:extremelyimmenselysupremelysuperb
very
 wealthy This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:on the contrary
but
 at least we need a healthy relationship with You use this word too often, consider replacing it withclantribegrouppeoplehousehousehold
family
 and You use this word too often, consider replacing it withcolleagueacquaintancebuddyassociatecompanionroommate
friends
. 