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Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems.

Nowadays, as a lot of people are concerning about and tackling global warming crisis, some of them argue that the major problem affecting the current environment is the extinction of plant and animal’s species. While others think that there are more than 1 essential environmental problems. First of all, some people believe that the loss of many species of plants and animals is the most important environmental problem because when some species of animal or plant are extinct, it creates dramatically negative impacts towards the global environment especially life cycle of other species. For example, if snakes do not exist, there will be an imbalance between the predators such as eagles and preys such as rats. As a result, the eagles may die and come to an extinction and other species will be affected accordingly. However, some people say that there are other important environmental problems because not only the loss of animals and plants affects the living things but human activities also. As humans would like to improve their wealth and welfare, they create pollutions by deforestation and economic activities for instance, leading to the worsened environment. In my opinion, I also believe that there would be more important environmental problems
Nowadays, as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are concerning about and tackling global warming crisis,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of them argue that the major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
affecting the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
environment is the extinction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plant
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal’s
species.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that there are more than 1 essential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
problems.

Often, this adverbial phrase is redundant. Consider using “first”.
First of all
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that the loss of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
species of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
when
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
species of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plant
are extinct, it creates
dramatically
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts towards the global environment
especially
life cycle of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
species.
For example
, if snakes do not exist, there will be an imbalance between the predators such as eagles and preys such as rats.
As a result
, the eagles may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to an extinction and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
species will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
accordingly
.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
say that there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the loss of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
affects the living things
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
human activities
also
. As humans would like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their wealth and welfare, they create pollutions by deforestation and economic activities
for instance
, leading to the worsened environment.

In my opinion, I
also
believe that there would be more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
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IELTS essay Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
201 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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