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Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn't sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn't sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work. yXPrV
People adhere to desparate idealogies. Consequently, a society of individual think that youngsters should work in their free time to earn money for daily needs and it can also help in their future job by learning basic skills related to their work and become good manners. While, others hold an opposing views by saying that students should focus on study, it is better choice for future. This essay will discuss the both side views and represent my perspective. There are two cardinal reason why they do part time work after the study. Tge first one is they know about the value of money by doing hard work. In other words, id schoolerz do extra time work, they should be depend on themselves, complete their daily needs and start saving money for targets. While, with these youngsters choose useable things and does not waste money on unnecessary things. The second reason is that gain more knowledge and work experience, students can learn and feel environment of workplace and it can help to youngsters gotten beeter job easily as compared to freshers. It moreover, a few people believe that do part time work is not good as well as focus on their learning skills. The primary reason is distraction of study. However, if pupils start working for extra time with these, they are busy in work and does not spen5 time on their study, after a few days they face some problem to focusing on their study and gotten bad result. Another reason is that free time work is temporary and stressful. While, if they do hard study and get higher score, its can help to provide secure and safe job due to higher qualifications. Apart from this, part time work is not for fixed time period, they could call to them any time for work, many time companies does not give break and rest time with these people can feel tired and it affect to health In my opinion, i reiterate that youngsters do part time work in free time to fulfill their dailt needs although, they focus on their study, they doea not depend on extra time work work because it is not for a permanent time and focus their study for better placement in future In conclusion, peoplw are different thoughts. Some say that part time work is help to manage financial statements as well as people people learn more skills for future jobs. On the other hand a group of members think that it is total waste of time and stressful for students and focusing on their study to get a better job in work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
adhere to
Possible spelling mistake found.
desparate
Possible spelling mistake found.
idealogies
.
Consequently
, a society of individual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that youngsters should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in their free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to earn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for daily needs and it can
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
in their future
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
by learning basic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
related to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and become
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
manners. While, others hold an opposing views by saying that students should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
focus
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
, it is better choice for future. This essay will discuss the both side views and represent my perspective.

There are two cardinal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
why they do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
after the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tge
first
one is they know about the value of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
by doing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
In other words
, id
Possible spelling mistake found.
schoolerz
do extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, they should be
Consider using the past participle "depended"?
depend
on themselves, complete their daily needs and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
saving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
for targets. While, with these youngsters choose useable things and does not waste
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on unnecessary things. The second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that gain more knowledge and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
experience, students can learn and feel environment of workplace and it can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to youngsters gotten
Possible spelling mistake found.
beeter
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
easily
as compared to freshers.

It
moreover
, a few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
focus
on their learning
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. The primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is distraction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
.
However
, if pupils
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
working for extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with these, they are busy in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and does not spen5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
, after a few days they face
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
problem to focusing on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
and gotten
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
result. Another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is temporary and stressful. While, if they do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
higher score, its can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to provide secure and safe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
due to higher qualifications. Apart from this,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is not for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
period, they could call to them any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
does not give break and rest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can feel tired and it affect to
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
health


In my opinion,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
reiterate that youngsters do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to fulfill their
Possible spelling mistake found.
dailt
needs although, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
focus
on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
, they
Possible spelling mistake found.
doea
not depend on extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is not for a permanent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
focus
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
for better placement in future

In conclusion
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
peoplw
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
thoughts.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to manage financial statements
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
learn more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
for future
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
.
On the other hand
a group of members
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "thinks"? (Some collective nouns can be treated as both singular and plural, so 'think' is not always incorrect.)
think
that it is total waste of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and stressful for students and focusing on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
in
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
work
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IELTS essay Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn't sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
436 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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