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Some people say that modern technology has made shopping today easier, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is argued shopping today has been made harder by the development of cutting-edge technology. However, in my opinion, I would believe that the appearance of portable devices made going shopping more convenient nowadays. On the one hand, there are several reasons why the latest technology has made it more difficult to shop. The first reason is that they can be defrauded or bothered by bad guys or unreliable shops on the internet. When customers pick or book products on an online shop, they would receive something else instead of the products they chose and also their money is poured down the drain without any acceptable reasons. For example, a lady who purchased an iPhone on the Amazon had been defrauded due to the fact that an iPhone she received was a brick. Moreover, when the internet is unavailable, any shopping actions would be delayed, and the clients cannot purchase it. On the other hand, I would believe that the grown of technology can make shopping become simpler than ever because of some reasons. The first one is that customers can purchase any products and goods easily throughout the internet really fast. They just stay at home with their portable devices is enough for them to come around any corner of the online shops without doing some walking, jogging, bicycling, and running. Besides, when users choose to go shopping online, they can get many discounts and deals from online shops on the internet. For instance, a lady once she surfed online shopping and she got a 60 per cent discount from a particular shop. In conclusion, although some people think that going to the supermarket is affected negatively by the appearance of cutting-edge technology, I personally suppose that shopping now is supported variety by technology.
It
is argued
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
has
been made
harder by the development of cutting-edge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
.
However
, in my opinion, I would believe that the appearance of portable devices made going
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
more convenient nowadays.

On the one hand, there are several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
why the latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has made it more difficult to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
. The
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that they can
be defrauded
or bothered by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
guys or unreliable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
on the internet. When customers pick or book products on an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
, they would receive something else
instead
of the products they chose and
also
their money
is poured
down the drain without any acceptable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
.
For example
, a lady who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
an iPhone on the Amazon had
been defrauded
due to the fact that an iPhone she received was a brick.
Moreover
, when the internet is unavailable, any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
actions would
be delayed
, and the clients cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
it.

On the other hand
, I would believe that the
The phrase ‘the grown of’ is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between ‘the’ and ‘of’.
grown
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
become simpler than ever
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
. The
first
one is that customers can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
any products and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
easily
throughout the internet
really
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
. They
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
stay at home with their portable devices is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
for them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
around any corner of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
without doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
walking, jogging, bicycling, and running.
Besides
, when users choose to go
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
discounts and deals from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
on the internet.
For instance
, a lady once she surfed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
shopping and
she
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
a 60 per cent discount from a particular shop.

In conclusion
, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that going to the supermarket is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
negatively
by the appearance of cutting-edge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, I
personally
suppose that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
is supported
variety by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
.
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IELTS essay Some people say that modern technology has made shopping today easier, while others disagree.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
295 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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