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Some people prefer watching sports on television to playing it. Is this a positive or negative thing?

Some people prefer watching sports on television to playing it. Is this a positive or negative thing? qL6kd
Sports play a crucial role in one's life these days. Physical activities engage people to have regular exercise to their body and mind to come out of regular stress and pressure. There are a large of advantages compared to disadvantages of playing sports. Individuals often prefer to sit at home leisurely and watch sports channels rather coming out of their comfort zone and playing them. It is intended that only about 40-50 percent pupils enjoy games besides other physical activities. Regular excercise often helps youngsters relax their body and mind, control one's own emotions and thoughts. It is obvious that there is no age restriction for individuals these days. In contrast, there are a plethora of disadvantages or has a negative impact. One of these are individuals may spoil their health and eye sight. Sitting back and enjoying sports may increase your body weight which is not a good sign. Entertainment is necessary, however, if used in a limited sense. Moreover, obesity is a serious issue which mainly occurs due to lack of excercise, unfortunately it is spreading in the world at a high pace due to decrease in outdoor games. Lack of participation in outdoor games keep them apart in flourishing their talents. To draw a conclusion, it has a plethora of bad effects or disadvantages. Indeed, government should encourage people to join sports and other club activities.
Sports
play a crucial role in one's life these days. Physical activities engage
people
to have regular exercise to their body and mind to
come
out of regular
stress
and pressure. There are a large of advantages compared to disadvantages of playing sports.

Individuals
often
prefer to sit at home
leisurely
and
watch
sports
channels
rather
coming out of their comfort zone and playing them. It
is intended
that
only
about 40-50 percent pupils enjoy games
besides
other physical activities. Regular
excercise
often
helps
youngsters relax their body and mind, control one's
own
emotions and thoughts. It is obvious that there is no age restriction for individuals these days.

In contrast
, there are a plethora of disadvantages or has a
negative
impact. One of these are individuals may spoil their health and
eye sight
. Sitting back and enjoying
sports
may increase your body weight which is not a
good
sign
. Entertainment is necessary,
however
, if
used
in a limited sense.
Moreover
, obesity is a serious issue which
mainly
occurs due to lack of
excercise
, unfortunately it is spreading in the world at a high pace due to decrease in outdoor games. Lack of participation in outdoor games
keep
them apart in flourishing their talents.

To draw a conclusion, it has a plethora of
bad
effects or disadvantages.
Indeed
,
government
should encourage
people
to
join
sports
and other club activities.
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IELTS essay Some people prefer watching sports on television to playing it. Is this a positive or negative thing?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
229 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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