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Some people prefer to travel alone. Others like to travel in groups. Which do you think is the best way to travel?

Some people prefer to travel alone. Others like to travel in groups. Which do you think is the best way to travel? a5xX
Of course, traveling is an extremely enjoyable activity. There is a category of people who prefers to travel alone, others prefer to travel with friends. both have their advantages, but Traveling alone is my preference. To start with, when you travel alone, it is more adventurous and enjoyable. In my opinion, when you travel, you should get to know other people's culture and I think traveling alone is the best way for it. When you travel alone you have more freedom, you don’t have to keep an eye on how to get along with friends. I have a big experience of both traveling: alone or with friends and I extremally joined the alone journey, I got known much more about cultural issues when I traveled alone. If I had a chance, I would have traveled around the world by myself. Secondly, many people consider that traveling alone is a bit boring and with friends, you won’t get bored, but I think that traveling alone is the best way of getting new friends. For example: when I went alone in Armenia I got a lot of friends and not I still in contact with them, however, when I go on a journey with my friends, I am concentrated on them and we have fun together and I don’t get many friends. Also when you travel with friends you had many headaches, for example, you need to find transportation tools, a hotel, and restaurants, etc.
Of course
, traveling is an
extremely
enjoyable activity. There is a category of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who prefers to
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travel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alone
, others prefer to
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travel
with
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friends
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
both
have their advantages,
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but
Traveling
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alone
is my preference.

To
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start
with, when you
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travel
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alone
, it is more adventurous and enjoyable. In my opinion, when you
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travel
, you should
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get
to know other
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people
's culture and I
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think
traveling
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alone
is the best way for it. When you
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travel
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alone
you have more freedom, you don’t
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have to
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keep
an eye on how to
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get
along with
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friends
. I have a
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big
experience of both traveling:
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alone
or with
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friends
and I
Possible spelling mistake found.
extremally
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joined
the
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alone
journey, I
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got
known much more about cultural issues when I traveled
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alone
. If I had a chance, I would have traveled around the world by myself.

Secondly
,
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many
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people
consider that traveling
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alone
is a bit boring and with
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friends
, you won’t
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get
bored,
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but
I
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think
that traveling
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alone
is the best way of getting new
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friends
.
For example
: when I went
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alone
in Armenia I
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got
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a lot of
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friends
and not I
still
in contact with them,
however
, when I go on a journey with my
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friends
, I
am concentrated
on
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
them and
we have fun together and I don’t
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get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
when you
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travel
with
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friends
you had
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many
headaches,
for example
, you need to find transportation tools, a hotel, and restaurants, etc.
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IELTS essay Some people prefer to travel alone. Others like to travel in groups. Which do you think is the best way to travel?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
243 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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