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Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss and give your opinion.

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss and give your opinion. ao77
Some people try not to change their lifestyle doing the same activities. But other people believe that a change is an important thing and it has positive sides. People who believe the same lifestyle and unchanging are important phenomenon point out that if individuals change their lives it is necessary to begin everything from the first step since it takes long years. They feel that it may require additional energy and health. To be more precise, imagine if one works at a company at a higher position, for getting this position or promotion what kind of difficulties did he face, maybe he did his best and expended his energy and health and changing easily lifestyle is not what they want. That is why these people likely do not prefer to change their way of life after such difficulties. Comment: Too wordy topic sentence! Other people, however, think that there are a number of positive sides of changing lives. They believe that changing the lifestyle is a significant trend as changing the way of life may change a person himself. As a result, a person will be self-confident, independent and be able to do any job anywhere without any difficulties. If individuals have to go to foreign countries by their job, they may easily fix to the cultures and lifestyles of foreigners since they are not afraid of anything, although it requires extra energy or health. So these people claim that changing the lifestyle does not have any negative effects. By way of conclusion, although the same thing and avoiding change have some positive trends, I firmly believe that to change lifestyle and start everything from the beginning have effective sides since it helps a person to be independent and self-confident.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
try not to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
doing the same activities.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
thing and it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
sides.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
and unchanging are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
phenomenon point out that if individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
it is necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
everything from the
first
step since it takes long years. They feel that it may require additional energy and health. To be more precise, imagine if one works at a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
at a higher position, for getting this position or promotion what kind of difficulties did he face, maybe he did his best and expended his energy and health and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changing
easily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
is not what they want.
That is
why these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
likely do not prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their way of life after such difficulties.

Comment: Too wordy topic sentence!

Other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
however
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that there are a number of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
sides of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changing
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
is a significant trend as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changing
the way of life may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
a person himself.
As a result
, a person will be self-confident, independent and be able to do any job anywhere without any difficulties. If individuals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go to foreign countries by their job, they may
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
to the cultures and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyles
of foreigners since they are not afraid of anything, although it requires extra energy or health.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
claim that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changing
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
does not have any
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects.

By way of conclusion, although the same thing and avoiding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
trends, I
firmly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lifestyle
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
everything from the beginning have effective sides since it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
a person to be independent and self-confident.
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IELTS essay Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss and give your opinion.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
290 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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