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Some people opine that extinction is a part of nature and preventing it from happening is futile. I partly disagree with this notion because there is a distinction between natural and human-induced extinction, and the latter may prove to be catastrophic to both humans and animals.

Some people opine that extinction is a part of nature and preventing it from happening is futile. I partly disagree with this notion because there is a distinction between natural and human-induced extinction, and the latter may prove to be catastrophic to both humans and animals. kWkbM
Some people opine that extinction is a part of nature and preventing it from happening is futile. I partly disagree with this notion because there is a distinction between natural and human-induced extinction, and the latter may prove to be catastrophic to both humans and animals. On the one hand, it is neither useful nor financially possible to try to save every species on planet Earth. The natural environments and habitats have been changing for billions of years. Throughout this timeframe, animal species have adapted to the changes or evolved into new species in order to survive. While one day it may be technologically feasible to preserve all animals in artificial environments, it will surely cost a prohibitive amount of tax money for research and implementation. Furthermore, the objective of such projects is questionable as they only provide insights that only the elite scientists have the ability to grasp, and it does not address what I believe is the main cause of mass extinction: human activities. On the other hand, I argue that we must be conscious that a wave of human-influenced mass extinction can also negatively affect our survival and that we have to make efforts to save the important animals. Human activities have led to global climate change, deforestation, severe pollution, and overhunting that consequently put a plethora of animals on the brink of extinction, including the keystone species. This could inflict irreparable damage to our societies in its wake. Take sharks that prey on seals for example, their population has been on the decline, owing to overfishing. With the limited presence of their predators, the seal population has multiplied and they have started to consume other fish that humans use as food at an unprecedented rate. If rules and regulation or education are not established to stop fishermen from driving sharks out of existence, we could expect a shortage of fish as a protein source in the near future. In conclusion, I think that it is prudent for our society to ensure the survival of particular species. However, this must be done strategically as not to waste further resources.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
opine that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extinction
is a part of nature and preventing it from happening is futile. I partly disagree with this notion
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there is a distinction between natural and human-induced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extinction
, and the latter may prove to be catastrophic to both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
and animals.

On the one hand, it is neither useful nor
financially
possible to try to save every species on planet Earth. The natural environments and habitats have been changing for billions of years. Throughout this timeframe,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
species have adapted to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
or evolved into new species in order to survive. While one day it may be
technologically
feasible to preserve all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
in artificial environments, it will
surely
cost a prohibitive amount of tax money for research and implementation.
Furthermore
, the objective of such projects is questionable as they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
provide insights that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the elite scientists have the ability to grasp, and it does not address what I believe is the main cause of mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extinction
:
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
activities.

On the other hand
, I argue that we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be conscious that a wave of human-influenced mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extinction
can
also
negatively
affect our survival and that we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
efforts to save the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Human
activities have led to global climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
, deforestation, severe pollution, and overhunting that
consequently
put a plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
on the brink of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extinction
, including the keystone species. This could inflict irreparable damage to our societies in its wake. Take sharks that prey on seals
for example
, their population has been on the decline, owing to overfishing. With the limited presence of their predators, the seal population has
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
multiplied and
they have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to consume other fish that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
as food at an unprecedented rate. If
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulation or education are not established to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
fishermen from driving sharks out of existence, we could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
a shortage of fish as a protein source in the near future.

In conclusion
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is prudent for our society to ensure the survival of particular species.
However
, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be done
strategically
as not to waste
further
resources.
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IELTS essay Some people opine that extinction is a part of nature and preventing it from happening is futile. I partly disagree with this notion because there is a distinction between natural and human-induced extinction, and the latter may prove to be catastrophic to both humans and animals.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
352 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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