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Some people fear that globalization will inevitably lead to the total loss of cultural identity. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people fear that globalization will inevitably lead to the total loss of cultural identity. with this statement? Jln26
There is a growing concern that globalisation is an unavoidable cause of the complete loss of cultural identity. In my opinion, although globalization is no doubt a threat to local cultures, it seems unlikely that a country’s cultural identity would dissolve completely because of it, and my reasons for this statement are going to be outlined below. To begin with, it cannot not be denied that increased exposure to world cultures is one of the main sources of this concern. With the development of the internet, people, especially youngsters, now have wider access to global media. Consequently, many of them are gradually losing interest in their own culture. For instance, most young people in Vietnam are turning their back on traditional music as they consider it behind the times compared to other kinds of music such as rock, EDM, and rap, which originate from foreign cultures. This is just one of the numerous pieces of evidence cultural diversity is under serious threat in this globalized world. However, as a response to this cultural threat, governments and their citizens are making more efforts to guarantee the protection of their culture. A concrete example of this is Wales. The risk that Welsh language might be killed off by social pressures used to be alarming in this nation, but, after decades of attempts, local authorities have managed to make their language become a vibrant part of Wels life again. This is proof that their national characteristics are still be well protected and will not disappear easily in this integrative context. In conclusion, in spite of posing risks to cultural diversity, globalization also plays an important role in encouraging people to preserve their own identity rather than leading to the loss of it.
There is a growing concern that
globalisation
is an unavoidable cause of the complete loss of
cultural
identity. In my opinion, although
globalization
is no doubt a threat to local
cultures
, it seems unlikely that a country’s
cultural
identity would dissolve completely
because
of it, and my reasons for this statement are going to
be outlined
below.

To
begin
with, it cannot not
be denied
that increased exposure to world
cultures
is one of the main sources of this concern. With the development of the internet,
people
,
especially
youngsters,
now
have wider access to global media.
Consequently
,
many
of them are
gradually
losing interest in their
own
culture
.
For instance
, most young
people
in Vietnam are turning their back on traditional music as they consider it behind the times compared to other kinds of music such as rock, EDM, and rap, which originate from foreign
cultures
. This is
just
one of the numerous pieces of evidence
cultural
diversity is under serious threat in this globalized world.

However
, as a response to this
cultural
threat,
governments
and their citizens are making more efforts to guarantee the protection of their
culture
. A concrete example of this is Wales. The
risk
that Welsh language might
be killed
off by social pressures
used
to be alarming in this nation,
but
, after decades of attempts, local authorities have managed to
make
their language become a vibrant part of
Wels
life again. This is proof that their national characteristics are
still
be
well protected and will not disappear
easily
in this integrative context.

In conclusion
,
in spite of
posing
risks
to
cultural
diversity,
globalization
also
plays an
important
role in encouraging
people
to preserve their
own
identity
rather
than leading to the loss of it.
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IELTS essay Some people fear that globalization will inevitably lead to the total loss of cultural identity. with this statement?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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