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Some people do believe that extreme sports are extremely dangerous and ought to be banned. I cannot agree to this extent.

Some people do believe that extreme sports are extremely dangerous and ought to be banned. I cannot agree to this extent. 0MAG9
Some people do believe that extreme sports are extremely dangerous and ought to be banned. I cannot agree to this extent. This essay will discuss why these kinds of sport are not that dangerous, as people might think, along with why these sports should not be prohibited by authorities. First and furthermore, extreme sports can be beneficial for people’s and mental and physical health. Many extreme athletes claim that the adrenaline rush provides a real sense of being alive. Moreover, extreme sports provide a full-body workout and keep us fit. By pushing one’s body to limits, calories are burnt up, while also balance and muscles strength are improving. In addition, following the instructor and cautious rules, extreme sports bring more enjoyment rather than danger. While I support regulations and safety measures, I hardly believe, it is possible to actually ban extreme sports in real life. Firstly, the government cannot cut out people from their hobbies or ways of spending leisure time, even if is extreme sports. Secondly, an even stronger argument against such a ban would be the difficulty of enforcing it. A number of these sports, skydiving, for example, are held far away from the reach of authorities. It is hard for me to imagine how the police are going to stop a person up the mountain’s cliff parachuting off it. In conclusion, based on my arguments above, practicing extreme sports is a healthy activity, if one remains extremely careful. Besides, it seems almost impossible, for me, for government to prohibit these kinds of sport.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extreme
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
are
extremely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
and ought to
be banned
. I cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
to this extent. This essay will discuss why these kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
are not that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
, along with why these
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sports
should not
be prohibited
by authorities.

First
and
furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extreme
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
can be beneficial for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
and mental and physical health.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extreme
athletes claim that the adrenaline rush provides a real sense of being alive.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extreme
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
provide a full-body workout and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
us fit. By pushing one’s body to limits, calories
are burnt
up, while
also
balance and muscles strength are improving.
In addition
, following the instructor and cautious
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extreme
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
bring more enjoyment
rather
than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
.

While I support regulations and safety measures, I hardly believe, it is possible to actually ban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extreme
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
in real life.
Firstly
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
out
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from their hobbies or ways of spending leisure time, even if is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extreme
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
.
Secondly
, an even stronger argument against such a ban would be the difficulty of enforcing it. A number of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
, skydiving,
for example
,
are held
far away from the reach of authorities. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for me to imagine how the police are going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
a person up the mountain’s cliff parachuting off it.

In conclusion
, based on my arguments above, practicing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extreme
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
is a healthy activity, if one remains
extremely
careful.
Besides
, it seems almost impossible, for me, for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to prohibit these kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
.
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IELTS essay Some people do believe that extreme sports are extremely dangerous and ought to be banned. I cannot agree to this extent.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
256 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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