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Some people claim that teens should be expected to do voluntary service in their spare time. Teenagers and the neighbourhood will benefit as well. And what point do you agree or disagree with that?

Some people claim that teens should be expected to do voluntary service in their spare time. Teenagers and the neighbourhood will benefit as well. And what point with that? yVAJ
All people, especially, teenage should come forward to do voluntary services in their leisure time to develop our country. I completely agree with this statement and let's discuss some of its viewpoints with examples prior to my opinion. Current and future generation should come forward to do voluntary service in community health like a survey to find out the number of epidemic and pandemic cases, free medical camp, free immunization service, health education, a workshop for make awareness about the poor lifestyle such as smoking, alcohol, and drug abuse. For instance, In the USA a study is conducted among young adults about their leisure time. As a result, 97% of the children are interested in watching tv, playing indoor games. I suggest, all the teenagers shall lean towards the free service to poor people to get benefits of free accommodation and food. Yet, in the undeveloped country, poverty is more due to a lack of food. In my opinion, all the teachers and parents should educate their children about the value of food and advice them not to waste food. In conclusion, I would like to suggest that all the teenagers can utilize their leisure time by free service to poor people. Consequently, it helps our country to develop.
All
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
especially
, teenage should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
forward to do voluntary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
in their leisure time to develop our country. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
's discuss
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of its viewpoints with examples prior to my opinion.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Current
and future generation should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
forward to do voluntary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
in community health like a survey to find out the number of epidemic and pandemic cases,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
medical camp,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
immunization
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
, health education, a workshop for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
awareness about the poor lifestyle such as smoking, alcohol, and drug abuse.
For instance
, In the USA a study
is conducted
among young adults about their leisure time.
As a result
, 97% of the children
are interested
in watching
Possible spelling mistake found.
tv
, playing indoor games. I suggest, all the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
shall lean towards the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
to poor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
accommodation and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
Yet
, in the undeveloped country, poverty is more due to a lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. In my opinion, all the teachers and parents should educate their children about the value of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
and advice them not to waste
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
In conclusion
, I would like to suggest that all the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
can utilize their leisure time by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
to poor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
Consequently
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
our country to develop.
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IELTS essay Some people claim that teens should be expected to do voluntary service in their spare time. Teenagers and the neighbourhood will benefit as well. And what point with that?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
209 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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