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Some people believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn and should not pay any tax to the state. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn and should not pay any tax to the state. MRoQ
It seems that tax is regard as a burden by some people ，because it reduced their disposable income. But my view is that we should pay tax ，because it is difficult to keep a society running without tax. By paying tax ，the government will have more funds to develop the public fundamental facilities Which can make our society more stable and prosperous. For example, the government can subsidize rural school programs. This will enable children from rural areas to gain knowledge and improve their literacy. So they are able to find employment in this knowledge based economy In the future. This is beneficial to the stability of the society. Another social problem relative to tax is that it can broaden economic divide if we don't have to pay the tax. It is known for everyone that the government has a budget which is used to support the social welfare institution and the people in need every year， Such as the subsidy to support orphanage and homeless people. The government can't afford them without tax revenue. so if people in need cannot get the assistant from government, it can lead to a wider gap between the poor and the rich. Therefore in many countries, people with higher income should pay more in tax while people with low income can get some support from the government. On the other hand, paying tax may have a negative effect on people's working passions. People with high income may feel unfair that they need to pay more tax than others， Which means that sometimes paying tax will discourage people's motivation to earn more money through work. As a result, it is detrimental to a company's productivity and can have an adverse effect on the development of economic. To sum up ，it is necessary for people to pay tax, although it can hurt someone's enthusiasm for work.
It seems that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
is regard as a burden by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
，
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
their disposable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
my view is that we should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
，
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is difficult to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
a society running without tax.

By paying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
Possible spelling mistake found.
，the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
will have more funds to develop the public fundamental facilities Which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
our society more stable and prosperous.
For example
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
can subsidize rural school programs. This will enable children from rural areas to gain knowledge and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their literacy.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
they are able to find employment in this knowledge based economy In the future. This is beneficial to the stability of the society.

Another social problem relative to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
is that it can broaden economic divide if we don't
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
. It
is known
for everyone that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
has a budget which is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to support the social welfare institution and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in need every
The character '，' is not a standard comma, although it can look like a comma. Use "year,".
year，
Such as the subsidy to support orphanage and homeless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
can't afford them without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
revenue.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
so
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in need cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the assistant from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
, it can lead to a wider gap between the poor and the rich.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
more in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
support from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.

On the other hand
, paying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
may have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's working passions.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
with high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
may feel unfair that they need to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
than
The character '，' is not a standard comma, although it can look like a comma. Use "others,".
others，
Which means that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
paying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
will discourage
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's motivation to earn more money through work.
As a result
, it is detrimental to a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
's productivity and can have an adverse effect on the development of economic.

To sum up
Possible spelling mistake found.
，it
is necessary for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
, although it can hurt someone's enthusiasm for work.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that they should be able to keep all the money they earn and should not pay any tax to the state.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
311 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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