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Some people believe that the problem of illigal drugs can be solved by legalising all drugs. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Some people believe that the problem of illigal drugs can be solved by legalising all drugs. 81EG
In this contemporary era, supply of illegal drugs has been increased in the whole world which is the sign of negative develpoment for every nation, so, to limit this people hold the opinion to legalise all the available drugs everywhere. I also in favor of the said opinion as this can have a positive effect in suspecting illigal drugs. To begin with, by makeing drugs in legal process can create the fear in the mind of the people not to indulge in this illigal activity as they will not manufacture the drugs which are prohibited in the society. Moreever, by putting the all drugs under legal process can impact on the spreading of these illigal drugs in the society which i believe is the main cause of degradation og youth nowadays. In addition, if the government will not take strict steps against this activity, it will be hard for higher authorities to control the illigal supply of the drugs in nation which is impactiong the progress of the world as youth have ease to get these iiligal drugs in the society. Also legalising the drugs can reduce the hidden profit of the drugs companies. Because many people are involve in this business due to the benefits of shortcut earning. To conclude, I believe that there should be a process of making all drugs legalised which not only helpful to save youth fr
In this contemporary era, supply of illegal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
has
been increased
in the whole world which is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
Possible spelling mistake found.
develpoment
for every nation,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, to limit this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
hold the opinion to
Possible spelling mistake. 'legalise' is British English.
legalise
all the available
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
everywhere.

I
also
in favor of the said opinion as this can have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effect in suspecting
Possible spelling mistake found.
illigal
drugs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, by
Possible spelling mistake found.
makeing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
in legal process can create the fear in the mind of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
not to indulge in this
Possible spelling mistake found.
illigal
activity as they will not manufacture the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
which
are prohibited
in the society.

Possible spelling mistake found.
Moreever
, by putting the all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
under legal process can impact on the spreading of these
Possible spelling mistake found.
illigal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
in the society which
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
believe is the main cause of degradation
Possible spelling mistake found.
og
youth nowadays.

In addition
, if the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
will not take strict steps against this activity, it will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for higher authorities to control the
Possible spelling mistake found.
illigal
supply of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
in nation which is
Possible spelling mistake found.
impactiong
the progress of the world as youth have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
these
Possible spelling mistake found.
iiligal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
in the society.
Also
Possible spelling mistake. 'legalising' is British English.
legalising
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the hidden profit of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.
“Because” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are involve in this business due to the benefits of shortcut earning.

To conclude
, I believe that there should be a process of making all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
Possible spelling mistake. 'legalised' is British English.
legalised
which not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
helpful to save youth
Make sure that 'fr' means 'franc'. Did you mean "for"?
fr
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IELTS essay Some people believe that the problem of illigal drugs can be solved by legalising all drugs.

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
231 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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