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Some people believe that the government should spend more money putting in more works of art like paintings and statues in cities to make them better places to live in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Investing in artwork pieces by the government is believed by people to improve the state of a country. I disagree with the idea since a country’s betterment involves trivial matters, including its people’s safety, and its rate of employment. A safe country ultimately makes it good to live in. Having its people to be able to stroll at night without having any fear for their lives is a sign that they condone violence which makes it a good place to live in and even start a family. A very high rate of employment within a country indicates that the government is doing its job. By keeping its men employed, this makes sure people will not experience poverty, hunger, or any kind of difficulties due to unemployment. An example would be the country New Zeland that has a high rate of employment causing it to always be the first choice of many foreign workers to migrate to when asked. On the other hand, having several artwork pieces displayed in a country does not contribute to its state. This does not ensure the living conditions of its people, whether they have a roof over their heads, or if they are eating three meals a day. Overall, i disagree with allocating more funds for artwork pieces since this does not have any correlation to a nation being a better place to live in. Significant matters like its safety and its rate of employment should be prioritized since this affects a country’s better progression.
Investing in artwork pieces by the
government
is believed
by
people
to
improve
the state of a
country
. I disagree with the
idea
since a
country’s
betterment involves trivial matters, including its
people’s
safety, and its
rate
of employment.

A safe
country
ultimately
makes
it
good
to
live
in. Having its
people
to be able to stroll at night without having any fear for their
lives
is a
sign
that they condone violence which
makes
it a
good
place to
live
in and even
start
a family.

A
very
high
rate
of employment within a
country
indicates that the
government
is doing its job. By keeping its
men
employed, this
makes
sure
people
will not experience poverty, hunger, or any kind of difficulties due to unemployment. An example would be the
country
New
Zeland
that has a high
rate
of employment causing it to always be the
first
choice of
many
foreign workers to migrate to when asked.

On the other hand
, having several artwork pieces displayed in a
country
does not contribute to its state. This does not ensure the living conditions of its
people
, whether they have a roof over their heads, or if they are eating three meals a day.

Overall
,
i
disagree with allocating more funds for artwork pieces since this does not have any correlation to a nation being a better place to
live
in. Significant matters like its safety and its
rate
of employment should
be prioritized
since this affects a
country’s
better progression.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that the government should spend more money putting in more works of art like paintings and statues in cities to make them better places to live in.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
250 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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