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Some people think that physical strenght is important in sport, while other thinks that mental strenght is more important. Do you agree or disagree?

Excelling in a sport requires both physical strength but also great mental toughness. Having the stamina is vital to sports since this will require tedious practices to be successful. Likewise, having good mental toughness is also important since this can give enough confidence to oneself and a strong commitment with playing. To be able to endure long duration of practicing is a necessity. The enjoyment that comes from playing sports is intertwined with the grueling hours of honing ones skills. NBA players are the perfect example for this. The players only show a glipmes of how tiresome playing the sport, basketball, really is. Moreover, this does not even include the time spent in preparing their bodies to withstand the endless running around the court and to be a succesful NBA player like them requires good body strength. On the other hand, having a good mental toughness is also vital in sports. The confidence, passion, commitment, and the right attitude are some of the key components to be able to truly enjoy playing. An example will be those persons with disabilities that still get to play and to enjoy sport. Despite not being blessed with perfect bodies, that did not stop them from playing but instead fueled their desire to improve their skills and eventually successing in their desired sport. In my opinion, having an excellent mental strength compared to having good physical strength, is more important to be successful in sports
Excelling in a
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sport
requires both physical strength
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
great
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mental
toughness.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Having
the stamina is vital to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
since this will require tedious practices to be successful.
Likewise
,
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having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
toughness is
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
since this can give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
confidence to oneself and a strong commitment with playing.

To be able to endure long duration of practicing is a necessity. The enjoyment that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
is intertwined
with the grueling hours of honing
Did you mean “one’s”?
ones
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
The genitive is possibly missing.
NBA players
are the perfect example for this. The players
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
a
Possible spelling mistake found.
glipmes
of how tiresome
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playing
the
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sport
, basketball,
really
is.
Moreover
, this does not even include the time spent in preparing their bodies to withstand the endless running around the court and to be a
Possible spelling mistake found.
succesful
NBA player like them requires
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good
body strength.

On the other hand
,
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having
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
toughness is
also
vital in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
. The confidence, passion, commitment, and the right attitude are
If the text is a generality, ‘of the’ is not necessary.
some of the
key components to be able to
truly
enjoy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
. An example will be those persons with disabilities that
still
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to play and to enjoy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
. Despite not
being blessed
with perfect bodies, that did not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
them from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
instead
fueled their desire to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and
eventually
Possible spelling mistake found.
successing
in their desired sport.

In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
an excellent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mental
strength compared to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
physical strength, is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to be successful in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
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IELTS essay Some people think that physical strenght is important in sport, while other thinks that mental strenght is more important.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
240 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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