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Some people believe that music is good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together do you agree or disagree with the satement give your opinion

Some people believe that music is good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together with the satement give your opinion 72RX
It is believed by some that music is a smooth and easy route for commuting people all over the globe along with vivid cultures and ages. I totally agree with the satement as music plays a vital role in each and everyones life. To start with, in current time there are many online music platforms which are prominent in giving their service all over the globe. This services are much more helpful for both listeners and artists. Such as soundcloud is an application which provides free music streaming users from different parts of the world with every age group, access this application to enjoy various genres of music. Furthermore, presently it is evitable that different cultural and different genres are promorted by other group of individuals. For example more of latin music and the American pop songs are getting chartbuster viewership in India. By visualising the content people have started getting attachments with song like a particular song which connects important events they have felt earlier in life. In conclusion from my vision, there is no doubt that music has eliminated all the barriers and made humans closer to eachother
It
is believed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is a smooth and easy route for commuting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
all over the globe along with vivid cultures and ages. I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
Possible spelling mistake found.
satement
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
plays a vital role in each and
Possible spelling mistake found.
everyones
life.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
time there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
platforms which are prominent in giving their service all over the globe.
Did you mean "these"?
This
services are much more helpful for both listeners and artists. Such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
soundcloud
is an application which provides free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
streaming users from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
parts of the world with every age group, access this application to enjoy various genres of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
.
Furthermore
,
presently
it is
Possible spelling mistake found.
evitable
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cultural and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
genres are
Possible spelling mistake found.
promorted
by other group of individuals.
For example
more of
Possible spelling mistake found.
latin
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
and the American pop songs are getting
Possible spelling mistake found.
chartbuster
viewership in India. By
Possible spelling mistake. 'visualising' is British English.
visualising
the content
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
getting attachments with song like a particular song which connects
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
they have felt earlier in life.
In conclusion
from my vision, there is no doubt that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
has eliminated all the barriers and made humans closer to
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
eachother
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IELTS essay Some people believe that music is good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together with the satement give your opinion

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
189 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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