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Some people believe that money is the most important factor for achieving happiness. However, others believe that happiness has nothing to do with money.

“Money talks, ” an expression that we hear on a regular basis; why not? Money is a measurement of success and prosperity; almost anything desired has a price on it. The influence of money is compelling and commanding, but have things spiraled out of control to the point that happiness is bought? A debate has risen; one side believes that money is the only source of happiness, while the other opposed, believing that happiness does not have a tag on it. On the one hand, we have people who say that happiness is a product like any other which could be bought. Whether it is by spending money on oneself such as: buying a new car, or spending it on others, for example: donating to charities or buying gifts for loved ones, another part of their mentality is “The more the merrier, ” by that they mean the more money they are able to rake in, the happier and more satisfied they get. On the other hand, we got people with a totally different mentality that believe that happiness is in no way, shape, or form correlated with money and that happiness is sought after and not bought. To give an example: taking care of oneself and doing all sorts of activities that please one’s soul and mind. The two utterly opposing mindsets have a common ground, which is that: no matter how you achieve it, making other people happy and doing good deeds towards them brings joy and delight into one’s heart. In my opinion, the key to solving any money-related debate is to satisfy both parties, and the case of money and happiness is no different. I believe that we can find a middle ground by aiming for a concise target; in this case, it is happiness. No matter how we differ in our methods of achieving happiness or in how much we pay to do so. Our goal is one, that is to draw a smile on our faces and on the faces of the ones we love.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
“Money
talks,
Don’t put a space on both sides of a quote symbol.
”
an expression that we hear on a regular basis; why not?
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Money
is a measurement of success and prosperity; almost anything desired has a price on it. The influence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is compelling and commanding,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
have things spiraled out of control to the point that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
? A debate has risen; one side believes that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
source of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
, while the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
opposed, believing that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
does not have a tag on it.

On the one hand, we have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
is a product like any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
which could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
. Whether it is by spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
on oneself such as: buying a new car, or spending it on others,
for example
: donating to charities or buying gifts for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
, another part of their mentality is “The more the merrier,
Don’t put a space on both sides of a quote symbol.
”
by that they mean the more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
they are able to rake in, the happier and more satisfied they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
with a
totally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
mentality that believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
is in no way, shape, or form correlated with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
and that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
is sought
after and not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
. To give an example: taking care of oneself and doing all sorts of activities that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
please
one’s soul and mind. The two
utterly
opposing mindsets have a common ground, which is that: no matter how you achieve it, making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
happy and doing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
deeds towards them brings joy and delight into one’s heart.

In my opinion, the key to solving any money-related debate is to satisfy both parties, and the case of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
is no
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
. I believe that we can find a middle ground by aiming for a concise target;
in this case
, it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
. No matter how we differ in our methods of achieving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
or in how much we pay to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
. Our goal is one,
that is
to draw a smile on our faces and on the faces of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that money is the most important factor for achieving happiness. However, others believe that happiness has nothing to do with money.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
341 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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