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Some people believe that it's beneficial for students to study at home than sending school. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that it's beneficial for students to study at home than sending school. N8GQ0
It is believed by a lot of individuals that homeschooling is much better to traditional education as learning can be done online. I think that teaching children at schools is a better idea. Despite having a great advancement in technology, students still need to have a proper guidance from the teacher and that is the thing, which is not possible while teaching them at home. Children who are studying in schools can ask a question and queries that they have, and solve their doubts. If sometime student face any kind of difficulty that is not being solved by the teacher, they could do it practically at a schools as where they have practical labs for that. Since they study in the school they also going to develop their social skills because they are so many students and while studying they interact with each other, which enable them to be more confident instead of being an introvert person while sitting at home. Having a proper attention on student is another benefit of sending them in schools. Generally, it could be seen that most of the student's parents are working and they do not have proper time to see that whether study is being done by the children or not. It might be possible that in the absence of them they do not do the work or if they hire any teacher then for that they have to pay such a huge amount of money. Therefore, It would be better if they send their children at schools since there are always a teacher, who always have supervision on them to observe what they are doing. To conclude, development in their social skills and having a proper guidance are the things that make teaching students at schools more preferable rather than studying children at home.
It
is believed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
individuals that homeschooling is much better to traditional education as learning can
be done
online. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that teaching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
is a better
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.

Despite having a great advancement in technology,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
still
need to have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proper
guidance from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
and
that is
the thing, which is not possible while teaching them at home.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
who are studying in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
can ask a question and queries that they have, and solve their doubts. If sometime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
face any kind of difficulty
that is
not
being solved
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
, they could do it
practically
at a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
as where they have practical labs for that. Since they study in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
they
also
going to develop their social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and while studying they interact with each other, which enable them to be more confident
instead
of being an introvert person while sitting at home.

Having a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proper
attention on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
is another benefit of sending them in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
.
Generally
, it could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that most of the student's parents are
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
working and
they do not have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proper
time to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that whether study is
being done
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
or not. It might be possible that in the absence of them they do not do the work or if they hire any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
then for that they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay such a huge amount of money.
Therefore
, It would be better if they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
since there are always a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
, who always have supervision on them to observe what they are doing.

To conclude
, development in their social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and having a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proper
guidance are the things that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
teaching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
more preferable
rather
than studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
at home.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that it's beneficial for students to study at home than sending school.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
302 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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