Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

SOME PEOPLE BELIEVE THAT IT IS VALUABLE FOR SOCIETY TO EXPERIMENT WITH BACTERIA AND VIRUSES WHILE OTHERS FEEL THIS IS DANGEROUS AND SHOULD NOT BE DONE. DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OPINION. v.2

SOME PEOPLE BELIEVE THAT IT IS VALUABLE FOR SOCIETY TO EXPERIMENT WITH BACTERIA AND VIRUSES WHILE OTHERS FEEL THIS IS DANGEROUS AND SHOULD NOT BE DONE. v. 2
EXPERIMENTING WITH VIRUSES AND BACTERIA HAS BEEN CONSIDERED BY MANY PEOPLE TO BE OF A GREAT IMPORT TO THE SOCIETY. ON THE CONTRARY, SOME CRITICS BELIEVE THAT THIS SHOULD NEVER BE ENCOURAGED AS IT IS TOO RISKY. IN MY OPINION, I THINK VIRAL AND BACTERIAL RESEARCH IS ESSENTIAL BECAUSE AN ANTIDOTE WILL BE READILY AVAILABLE IN CASE OF ANY MICROBIAL OUTBREAK. ON ONE HAND, EXPERIMENT WITH MICROORGANISMS IS ESSENTIAL FOR THE WORLD. THIS IS BECAUSE THROUGH SUCH RESEARCH, SCIENTISTS GET TO UNDERSTAND THE PATHOGENESIS OF DISEASES CAUSED BY THESE PATHOGENS THEREBY PRODUCING DRUGS AND VACCINES AGAINST SUCH BIOLOGICAL AGENTS AS WELL AS RECOMMENDING SOME PRECAUTIONARY MEASURES AGAINST CONTRACTING THE DISEASES SHOULD THERE BE AN EPIDEMIC. THAT IS TO SAY THAT IF THE PATHOGEN CAUSING A DISEASE REMAINS UNKNOWN, THERE WOULD VIRTUALLY BE NO CURE FOR THE AILMENT CAUSED BY THE AGENT AND SUCH OUTBREAK WOULD BE DIFFICULT TO CONTAIN. FOR EXAMPLE, A RECENT REPORT BY CENTRE FOR DISEASE CONTROL AND PREVENTION SHOWS THAT THE PREVALENCE OF ROTAVIRUS HAS DRASTICALLY REDUCED BY 78% IN CHILDREN AGED 0-5 SINCE MOST PARENTS ADOPTED VACCINATING THEIR BABIES AGAINST THE VIRUS. NEVERTHELESS, SOME PEOPLE ARE OF THE OPINION THAT BACTERIAL AND VIRAL STUDY ARE TOO MUCH OF A RISK AND SHOULD NOT BE CARRIED OUT IN THE FIRST PLACE. THE MAJOR REASON FOR THIS IS THE TENDENCY OF THESE MICROBIAL AGENTS TO CAUSE A PANDEMIC IF THEY GET INTO THE WRONG HANDS. FOR INSTANCEE, IN NOVEMBER 1944, A BIOLOGICAL RESEARCHER WAS BRIBED BY A CERTAIN GOVERNMENT TO RELEASE SOME PARTICLES OF THE DEADLY BACILLUS ANTHRACIS THROUGH THE CENTRAL AIR-CONDITIONER IN AN AUDITORIUM DURING AN ECONOMIC CONFERENCE SO AS TO TERMINATE THE LIVES OF THEIR POLITICAL OPPONENTS. THE INCIDENCE LED TO CHAOS, PANIC ATTACK AND UNPRECEDENTED DEATHS IN THAT COUNTRY. IN CONCLUSION, WHILE MANY PEOPLE KICK AGAINST MICROBIAL STUDY, I BELIEVE SUCH RESEARCH IS NECESSARY BECAUSE OF THEIR POSITIVE IMPACT IN MEDICINE. IF SUCH RESEARCH IS IN PLACE AND HANDLED AS A CLASSIFIED INFORMATION, IT WILL BE EASY TO CONTAIN THE VIRUS OR BACTERIA SHOULD ANY EPIDEMIC OR PANDEMIC OCCUR.
EXPERIMENTING WITH VIRUSES AND BACTERIA HAS
BEEN CONSIDERED
BY
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
MANY
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
PEOPLE
TO BE OF A GREAT IMPORT TO THE SOCIETY.
ON THE CONTRARY
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SOME
CRITICS BELIEVE THAT THIS SHOULD NEVER
BE ENCOURAGED
AS IT IS TOO RISKY. IN MY OPINION, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
THINK
VIRAL AND BACTERIAL
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
RESEARCH
IS ESSENTIAL
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BECAUSE
AN ANTIDOTE WILL BE
READILY
AVAILABLE IN CASE OF ANY MICROBIAL OUTBREAK.

ON ONE HAND, EXPERIMENT WITH MICROORGANISMS IS ESSENTIAL FOR THE WORLD. THIS IS
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BECAUSE
THROUGH SUCH
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
RESEARCH
, SCIENTISTS
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
GET
TO UNDERSTAND THE PATHOGENESIS OF
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
DISEASES
CAUSED BY THESE PATHOGENS THEREBY PRODUCING DRUGS AND VACCINES AGAINST SUCH BIOLOGICAL AGENTS
AS WELL
AS RECOMMENDING
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SOME
PRECAUTIONARY MEASURES AGAINST CONTRACTING THE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
DISEASES
SHOULD THERE BE AN EPIDEMIC.
THAT IS
TO SAY THAT IF THE PATHOGEN CAUSING A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
DISEASE
REMAINS UNKNOWN, THERE WOULD
VIRTUALLY
BE NO CURE FOR THE AILMENT CAUSED BY THE AGENT AND SUCH OUTBREAK WOULD BE DIFFICULT TO CONTAIN.
FOR EXAMPLE
, A RECENT REPORT BY
Possible spelling mistake. 'CENTRE' is British English.
CENTRE
FOR
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
DISEASE
CONTROL AND PREVENTION
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
SHOWS
THAT THE PREVALENCE OF ROTAVIRUS HAS
DRASTICALLY
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
REDUCED
BY 78% IN CHILDREN AGED 0-5 SINCE MOST PARENTS ADOPTED VACCINATING THEIR BABIES AGAINST THE VIRUS.

NEVERTHELESS
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SOME
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
PEOPLE
ARE OF THE OPINION THAT BACTERIAL AND VIRAL STUDY ARE TOO MUCH OF A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
RISK
AND SHOULD NOT
BE CARRIED
OUT IN THE
FIRST
PLACE. THE MAJOR REASON FOR THIS IS THE TENDENCY OF THESE MICROBIAL AGENTS TO CAUSE A PANDEMIC IF THEY
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
GET
INTO THE
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
WRONG
HANDS. FOR
Possible spelling mistake found.
INSTANCEE
, IN NOVEMBER 1944, A BIOLOGICAL RESEARCHER
WAS BRIBED
BY A CERTAIN
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
GOVERNMENT
TO RELEASE
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SOME
PARTICLES OF THE DEADLY BACILLUS
Possible spelling mistake found.
ANTHRACIS
THROUGH THE CENTRAL AIR-CONDITIONER IN AN AUDITORIUM DURING AN ECONOMIC CONFERENCE
'So as to' expresses purpose and is used in formal texts. Consider using "to"
SO AS TO
TERMINATE THE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
LIVES
OF THEIR POLITICAL OPPONENTS. THE INCIDENCE LED TO CHAOS, PANIC ATTACK AND UNPRECEDENTED DEATHS IN THAT COUNTRY.

IN CONCLUSION
, WHILE
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
MANY
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
PEOPLE
KICK AGAINST MICROBIAL STUDY, I BELIEVE SUCH
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
RESEARCH
IS NECESSARY
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BECAUSE
OF THEIR
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
POSITIVE
IMPACT IN MEDICINE. IF SUCH
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
RESEARCH
IS IN PLACE AND HANDLED AS A CLASSIFIED INFORMATION, IT WILL BE EASY TO CONTAIN THE VIRUS OR BACTERIA SHOULD ANY EPIDEMIC OR PANDEMIC OCCUR.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
One should not aim at being possible to understand but at being impossible to misunderstand.
Marcus Fabius Quintilian

IELTS essay SOME PEOPLE BELIEVE THAT IT IS VALUABLE FOR SOCIETY TO EXPERIMENT WITH BACTERIA AND VIRUSES WHILE OTHERS FEEL THIS IS DANGEROUS AND SHOULD NOT BE DONE. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
344 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts