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PLASTIC SHOPPING BAGS ARE USED WIDELY AND CAUSE MANY ENVIRONMENTAL PROBLEMS. SOME PEOPLE SAY THEY SHOULD BE BANNED. TO WHAT EXTENT DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE? v.3

PLASTIC SHOPPING BAGS ARE USED WIDELY AND CAUSE MANY ENVIRONMENTAL PROBLEMS. SOME PEOPLE SAY THEY SHOULD BE BANNED. v. 3
NO ONE WOULD DENY THAT PLASTIC BAGS WHICH ARE USED IN SHOPS AND SUPERMARKETS HAVE DAMAGING EFFECTS ON THE LAND AND WATER. AS A RESULT, MANY PEOPLE ARE ADVOCATING FOR THEIR BAN. ON THE CONTRARY, I THINK NYLON SHOPPING BAGS SHOULD NOT BE BANNED BECAUSE THE REPLACEMENT FOR THESE BAGS CARRY SIGNIFICANT ENVIRONMENTAL RISK. THE MAIN PROBLEM CAUSED BY NYLON BAGS IS THAT THEY DO NOT DEGRADE AND EVENTUALLY END UP AS LITTER IN OUR CITIES AND OCEANS. AN INSIGNIFICANT NUMBER OF PEOPLE MAY REUSE OR RECYCLE NYLON BAGS BUT MOST ULTIMATELY LITTER OR TOSS THEM IN THE TRASH. IF THEY ARE THROWN IN THE TRASH, THESE BAGS WILL END UP IN THE EVER-INCREASING LANDFILLS CAUSING AN INEVITABLE SOIL POLLUTION. THOSE BAGS THAT ARE LITTERED WILL WIND UP IN THE CITIES CAUSING ENVIRONMENTAL NUISSANCE OR CLOG THE DRAINS WHICH MAY END UP IN THE SEAS THEREBY ENTANGLING MARINE LIFE. FOR EXAMPLE, IN 2003, A STUDY CARRIED OUT BY OXFORD UNIVERSITY REPORTED THAT 67% OF MARINE DEATH IS CAUSED BY SUFFOCATION BY POLYTHENE BAGS. DESPITE THE ADVANTAGES OF BANNING POLYTHENE BAGS, THEIR REPLACEMENT CAN CAUSE MANY ENVIRONMENTAL PROBLEMS. ALTHOUGH SOME CRITICS ADVOCATE FOR THE USE OF PAPER BAGS WHICH ARE BIODEGRADABLE, PAPER PRODUCTION WHICH REQUIRES CONSTANT CLEARING OF BUSHES WILL FINALLY LEAD TO DEFORESTATION. CONSEQUENTLY, THIS WILL DISRUPT THE ECOSYSTEM BY DECREASING FOOD PRODUCTION. THAT IS TO SAY THAT WHEN THE TREES ARE OFTEN CUT, THERE WILL BE A DECLINE IN THE POPULATION OF USEFUL FARM INSECTS SUCH AS BEES, BUTTERFLIES AND PRAYING MANTIS BECAUSE THE ENVIRONMENT WILL NO LONGER BE CONDUCIVE FOR THEM TO THRIVE. FOR INSTANCE, A RECENT STUDY BY YORK DALE UNIVERSITY FOUND THAT CONSTANT FALLING OF TREES IS LINKED WITH 48% DECLINE IN AGRICULTURAL OUTPUT. IN CONCLUSION, I BELIEVE THAT PLASTIC SHOPPING BAGS SHOULD NOT BE BANNED BECAUSE THE ALTERNATIVE TO THESE BAGS POSES A GREATER RISK ON THE ECONOMY. THE ENVIRONMENTAL POLICY MAKERS SHOULD DO MORE AND FORMULATE A POLICY THAT WILL ENCOURAGE REUSING OR RECYCLING OF PLASTIC BAGS.
NO ONE WOULD DENY THAT PLASTIC
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
BAGS
WHICH ARE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
USED
IN SHOPS AND SUPERMARKETS HAVE DAMAGING EFFECTS ON THE LAND AND WATER.
AS A RESULT
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
MANY
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
PEOPLE
ARE ADVOCATING FOR THEIR BAN.
ON THE CONTRARY
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
THINK
NYLON SHOPPING
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
BAGS
SHOULD NOT
BE BANNED
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BECAUSE
THE REPLACEMENT FOR THESE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
BAGS
CARRY SIGNIFICANT
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ENVIRONMENTAL
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
RISK
.

THE MAIN PROBLEM CAUSED BY NYLON
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
BAGS
IS THAT THEY DO NOT DEGRADE AND
EVENTUALLY
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
END
UP AS LITTER IN OUR CITIES AND OCEANS. AN INSIGNIFICANT NUMBER OF
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
PEOPLE
MAY REUSE OR RECYCLE NYLON
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
BAGS
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BUT
MOST
ULTIMATELY
LITTER OR TOSS THEM IN THE TRASH. IF THEY
ARE THROWN
IN THE TRASH, THESE
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BAGS
WILL
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
END
UP IN THE EVER-INCREASING LANDFILLS CAUSING AN INEVITABLE SOIL POLLUTION. THOSE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
BAGS
THAT
ARE LITTERED
WILL WIND UP IN THE CITIES CAUSING
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ENVIRONMENTAL
Possible spelling mistake found.
NUISSANCE
OR CLOG THE DRAINS WHICH MAY
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
END
UP IN THE SEAS THEREBY ENTANGLING MARINE LIFE.
FOR EXAMPLE
, IN 2003, A STUDY CARRIED OUT BY OXFORD UNIVERSITY REPORTED THAT 67% OF MARINE DEATH
IS CAUSED
BY SUFFOCATION BY POLYTHENE BAGS.

DESPITE THE ADVANTAGES OF BANNING POLYTHENE
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BAGS
, THEIR REPLACEMENT CAN CAUSE
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
MANY
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ENVIRONMENTAL
PROBLEMS. ALTHOUGH
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
SOME
CRITICS ADVOCATE FOR THE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
USE
OF PAPER
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
BAGS
WHICH ARE BIODEGRADABLE, PAPER PRODUCTION WHICH REQUIRES CONSTANT CLEARING OF BUSHES WILL
FINALLY
LEAD TO DEFORESTATION.
CONSEQUENTLY
, THIS WILL DISRUPT THE ECOSYSTEM BY DECREASING FOOD PRODUCTION.
THAT IS
TO SAY THAT WHEN THE TREES ARE
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
OFTEN
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
CUT
, THERE WILL BE A DECLINE IN THE POPULATION OF USEFUL FARM INSECTS SUCH AS BEES, BUTTERFLIES AND PRAYING MANTIS
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BECAUSE
THE ENVIRONMENT WILL NO LONGER BE CONDUCIVE FOR THEM TO THRIVE.
FOR INSTANCE
, A RECENT STUDY BY YORK DALE UNIVERSITY FOUND THAT CONSTANT FALLING OF TREES
IS LINKED
WITH 48% DECLINE IN AGRICULTURAL OUTPUT.

IN CONCLUSION
, I BELIEVE THAT PLASTIC SHOPPING
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
BAGS
SHOULD NOT
BE BANNED
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BECAUSE
THE ALTERNATIVE TO THESE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
BAGS
POSES A GREATER
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
RISK
ON THE ECONOMY. THE
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ENVIRONMENTAL
POLICY MAKERS SHOULD DO MORE AND FORMULATE A POLICY THAT WILL ENCOURAGE REUSING OR RECYCLING OF PLASTIC
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
BAGS
.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay PLASTIC SHOPPING BAGS ARE USED WIDELY AND CAUSE MANY ENVIRONMENTAL PROBLEMS. SOME PEOPLE SAY THEY SHOULD BE BANNED. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
333 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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