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some people believe that it is important to follow traditions even if it conflicts with their beliefs, others believe individual preferences are more important than traditions

some people believe that it is important to follow traditions even if it conflicts with their beliefs, others believe individual preferences are more important than traditions gblrL
There is no doubt that our traditions and beliefs have important impacts on our lives and can affect our decisions. In this process, many people prefer to follow their beliefs and others confined themselves with traditions. You can see their title roles in people's lives who live around you, clearly. I believe each person should follow its beliefs for two important reasons, which I will explore in the following essay. The main reason is that we would have healthy minds when we follow our beliefs; when a significant conflict occurs in our minds between these elements, we definitely suffer from bad emotions. In fact, scholars have proved that when a person chooses its idea in this condition, its brains' glands secrete a specific chemical substance that increases our brain's abilities. The fact can convince all people to follow their beliefs, who does not want to become clever? As you know, in the modern world we face many problems, and we should solve them. Therefore, we need a healthy and free mind to find the best solution, and when we select to have our ideas, when can see solutions clearly. My personal experience is a compelling illustration of this. Five years ago, when I was a child, one day, my grandparents and I had a debate on traditions' origins. Although I was stuck in a bad situation those days, they made me follow some traditions that I did not even know their reasons and benefits. Hence, I decided to stop this procedure and choose my own path. After this decision, with each step forward to my own belief, I felt that I had no concerns about other people's ideas. Therefore, I could choose my own solutions without considering traditions. I was a free person out of the cage who could fix his problems readily. Drawing from my own experience, you can see each person who wants to have a healthy mind should follow its beliefs. In fact, If I had never chosen my own way, I would have never become a successful person. Another reason is that traditions can not solve problems in the modern world because they do not belong to our lives. Each environment or society has its specific conditions; hence, people should follow their own beliefs to become successful people. Even the key to success in each society differs from others, so who can say you would achieve your goals with traditions' advice. Some studies have been done by scholars that show us people who preferred their experiments and beliefs have comfortable lives with a long life expectancy. In contrast, another group who just made their decisions on their traditions had a poor life without any significant achievement in their lives. Therefore, I would like to spend my time on my own path with my own belief. At the end of this process, whether I lose or win, I would be a winner because my life is based on my beliefs. In conclusion, I strongly feel that people should select their own beliefs and abandon traditions. Not only will people have a healthy mind but also, they achieve success. That's why I believe people should prefer their own opinions.
There is no doubt that our
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traditions
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beliefs
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
impacts on our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
and can affect our decisions. In this process,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
follow
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beliefs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
confined themselves with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
. You can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
their title roles in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
around you,
clearly
. I believe each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
follow
its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beliefs
for two
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
, which I will explore in the following essay.

The main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that we would have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
minds
when we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
follow
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beliefs
; when a significant conflict occurs in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
minds
between these elements, we definitely suffer from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
emotions. In fact, scholars have proved that when a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
chooses its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
in this condition, its brains' glands secrete a specific chemical substance that increases our brain's abilities. The fact can convince all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
follow
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beliefs
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
does not want to become clever? As you know, in the modern world we face
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
problems, and we should solve them.
Therefore
, we need a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
and free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mind
to find the best solution, and when we select to have our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
, when can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
solutions
clearly
. My personal experience is a compelling illustration of this. Five years ago, when I was a child, one day, my grandparents and I had a debate on traditions' origins. Although I
was stuck
in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
situation those days, they made me
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
follow
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
that I did not even know their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
and benefits.
Hence
, I decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
this procedure and choose my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
path. After this decision, with each step forward to my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
belief
, I felt that I had no concerns about other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
.
Therefore
, I could choose my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
solutions without considering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
. I was a free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
out of the cage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
his problems
readily
. Drawing from my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
experience, you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
wants to have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mind
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
follow
its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beliefs
. In fact, If I had never chosen my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
way, I would have never become a successful person.

Another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
can not solve problems in the modern world
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they do not belong to our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
. Each environment or society has its specific conditions;
hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
follow
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beliefs
to become successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Even the key to success in each society differs from others,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
can say you would achieve your goals with traditions' advice.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
studies have
been done
by scholars that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
us
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
preferred their experiments and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beliefs
have comfortable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
with a long life expectancy.
In contrast
, another group
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
made their decisions on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
had a poor life without any significant achievement in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
.
Therefore
, I would like to spend my time on my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
path with my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
belief
. At the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of this process, whether I lose or win, I would be a winner
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
my life
is based
on my beliefs.

In conclusion
, I
strongly
feel that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should select their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beliefs
and abandon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mind
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
, they achieve success. That's why I believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should prefer their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
opinions.
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IELTS essay some people believe that it is important to follow traditions even if it conflicts with their beliefs, others believe individual preferences are more important than traditions

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
531 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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