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What changes are expected to come in the 21st century? Express your opinion on the upcoming changes

What changes are expected to come in the 21st century? Express your opinion on the upcoming changes 1o2xG
The 21st century has already commenced. Till now, a lot of changes have been encountered in different fields and a lot more to be expected in the near future. In my perspective, technology, life style and mother nature are more prone to changes in the further years. Firstly, technological field is more likely to face changes. Wide range of research programmes and the evolution of technological enterprises will bring forth new cutting edge technologies to ease human life. It will affect even the small machinery in use. Conversely, even robots will be made available for daily use in the future. Secondly, technological innovations increases the pace of mordern life. Life style, food habits and dressing styles will change accordingly. Life will be more mechanical with rare emotional attachments. It may drastically affect interpersonal and social relationships. People are more likely to run behind money and more materialistic things. Over use of fast food may bring in new health problems. Thirdly, Industrial revolution will increase chances of pollution and contamination of surroundings which may result in the deterioration of mother nature. Any imbalance created in the nature and ecosystem will pave way for the occurrence of natural disasters, some of which have been already faced by us in the previous years. In my view point, the world will lose its naturality owing to the emergence of new technologies and increased interest in fast mechanical life. If the world has changed incredibly in the past 3 years due to covid pandemic, the changes on the run in the coming years is completely unimaginable.
The 21st century has already commenced. Till
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
have
been encountered
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
fields and a lot more to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
in the near future. In my perspective, technology,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
style and mother nature are more prone to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
in the
further
years.

Firstly
, technological field is more likely to face
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
. Wide range of research
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
and the evolution of technological enterprises will bring forth new cutting edge technologies to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. It will affect even the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
machinery in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.
Conversely
, even robots will
be made
available for daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
in the future.

Secondly
, technological innovations increases the pace of
Possible spelling mistake found.
mordern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Life
style, food habits and dressing styles will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
accordingly
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Life
will be more mechanical with rare emotional attachments. It may
drastically
affect interpersonal and social relationships.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
are more likely to run behind money and more materialistic things. Over
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
food may bring in new health problems.

Thirdly
, Industrial revolution will increase chances of pollution and contamination of surroundings which may result in the deterioration of mother nature. Any imbalance created in the nature and ecosystem will pave way for the occurrence of natural disasters,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of which have been already faced by us in the previous years.

In my view point, the world will lose its
Possible spelling mistake found.
naturality
owing to the emergence of new technologies and increased interest in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
mechanical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. If the world has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
incredibly
in the past 3 years due to
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
covid
pandemic, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
on the run in the coming years is completely unimaginable.
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IELTS essay What changes are expected to come in the 21st century? Express your opinion on the upcoming changes

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
261 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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