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For many people, shopping is a pleasant activity. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

For many people, shopping is a pleasant activity. Kyad3
Shopping is a favorited activity for many people for different reason. This essay will be writing as an agreeable concept of the topic. While shopping is the happiest time for many people some reasons, some people still think it is bored. First, shopping can give you a new experiment of your view the thing different way. Second, shopping can give your motivation for health. Firstly, shopping can give you a new experiment when your eyes have seen many different interesting and fantastic things displaying around you. Eye gets never tired of seeing a new thing and give the mind excited for the new experiment. For example, when I went to apple store of Siam Center in Bangkok, I can walk the whole day to get the best price and quality of computer. I did not get tired of walking. This experience gives me a happy time to get a new computer. Second, shopping can give your motivation of health because when shopper walks the whole day for their desire one, they automatically do exercise for health. Some people prepare themselves to go shopping with showing beautiful body part by putting themselves on diet. For example, when my friend and I went to shopping Victorious Center store, my friends did exercise a lot for body show off. This was the best time for my friends to visit the store the whole day without getting tired. In conclusion, shopping can the best time for many people to view the new thing for relaxing mental and motivated for keeping body healthy.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Shopping
is a
Possible spelling mistake found.
favorited
activity for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
reason. This essay will be writing as an agreeable concept of the topic. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
is the happiest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
still
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it
is bored
.
First
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
you a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
experiment of your view the thing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
way. Second,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
your motivation for health.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
you a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
experiment when your eyes have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
interesting and fantastic things displaying around you. Eye
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
never tired of seeing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
thing and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
the mind excited for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
experiment.
For example
, when I went to
Did you mean the proper noun "Apple Store"?
apple store
of Siam Center in Bangkok, I can walk the whole day to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the best price and quality of computer. I did not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
tired of walking. This experience
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gives
me a happy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
computer.

Second,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
your motivation of health
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
when shopper walks the whole day for their desire one, they
automatically
do exercise for health.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prepare themselves to go
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
with showing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
body part by putting themselves on diet.
For example
, when my friend and I went to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
Victorious Center store, my friends did exercise a lot for body
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
off. This was the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for my friends to visit the store the whole day without getting tired.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
can the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to view the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
thing for relaxing mental and motivated for keeping body healthy.
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IELTS essay For many people, shopping is a pleasant activity.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
258 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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